In many countries people have to pay for medical care, but some think that it should be a free service provided by the government. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
In many places around the world,
people
have to pay for health
care
, but some individuals argue that medical services should be paid by
the governments. As far as I am concerned I disagree with the latter. In Change preposition
for by
this
essay, I will explain why.
There are multiple person
Change to a plural noun
people
that
think that Correct pronoun usage
who
to pay
for Change the verb form
paying
health
care
is not right, and they believe it should be government
Correct article usage
a government
duties
. These Fix the agreement mistake
duty
people
sustain that governments have to cover all the medical expenditures for every citizens
. Change to a singular noun
citizen
For instance
, these individuals want that
institutions Correct word choice
apply
have
to pay, Unnecessary verb
apply
instead
of them and all population
, for all medicines and for the Correct article usage
the population
doctor
salaries. Personally, I think is Fix the agreement mistake
doctors
an
utopic thought that these Change the article
a
people
are doing about it. By the way, there are good reasons for
pay medical Fix the infinitive
to for
care
.
In many countries, people
must pay for their health
care
, sometimes with different systems, but it depend
on Change the verb form
depends
country
. Add an article
the country
However
, doctors have the faculty of save
our Change the verb form
saving
life
, as much as medicines, those are the main Fix the agreement mistake
lives
reason
why should be Fix the agreement mistake
reasons
a
Correct article usage
apply
must
paid for Verb problem
apply
health
care
. For example
, in Italy
Add a comma
Italy,
people
usually pay for medical care
through a specific tax. This
money is collected from all citizens in order to have enough funds to pay hospitals medicines, doctors'
salaries for everybody.
In conclusion, governments without financial Correct word choice
and doctors'
supports
from Fix the agreement mistake
support
population
can not pay for everything, especially Add an article
a population
the population
they
can not Correct word choice
if they
covered
all medical Change the verb form
cover
care
services for each individual. I believe that every person should contributes
, Change the verb form
contribute
thus
people
have to pay for health
care
services.Submitted by bucciarellianna3 on
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task response
Ensure that your essay consistently addresses the prompt. While you discuss reasons for paying for healthcare, make sure to connect them clearly to your disagreement with free healthcare services provided by the government.
coherence and cohesion
Work on organizing your paragraphs more effectively. Each paragraph should present a single clear idea that supports your main argument, and the flow between paragraphs could be smoother. Consider using transition phrases to enhance coherence.
task response
Provide more relevant and specific examples to support your points, such as statistics, case studies, or other concrete evidence. This will make your argument more compelling.
coherence and cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps frame the argument effectively.
task response
The writer clearly presents their opinion in the introduction, which is maintained throughout the essay. This demonstrates a consistent task response.
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite