IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 8.5

People believe that they should be able to keep all the money they earn and should not pay tax to the state. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

#people #money #tax
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Some people argue that they should be entitled to retain all the money they earn without paying
taxes
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 to the state.
However
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, I totally disagree with
this
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 view.
Firstly
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,
taxes
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 are essential for funding public goods and
services
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 that benefit everyone in
society
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. Without
taxes
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, the government would be unable to provide critical
services
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such
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 as healthcare, education, infrastructure, and public safety.
For example
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, public hospitals and schools rely heavily on tax revenue to operate and maintain their
services
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. If individuals kept all their earnings, these vital
services
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 would suffer, leading to a decline in the
overall
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 quality of life.
Therefore
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,
taxes
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 are a necessary contribution to the common good, ensuring that essential
services
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 are available to all citizens.
Secondly
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,
taxes
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 play a crucial role in reducing income inequality and promoting social equity. Through a progressive tax system, where higher earners pay a larger percentage of their income, the government can redistribute wealth and provide support to the less fortunate.
This
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 helps to create a more balanced and fair
society
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.
For instance
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, social welfare programs and unemployment benefits, funded by
taxes
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, offer a safety net for those in need. By contributing to these programs, individuals help to create a more just and equitable
society
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.
Thus
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, paying
taxes
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 is a way to ensure that everyone has access to basic necessities and opportunities for a better life. In conclusion, I firmly disagree with the notion that people should keep all the money they earn and not pay
taxes
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 since
taxes
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 are indispensable for funding public
services
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 and reducing income inequality.
Hence
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, ensuring a well-functioning
society
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 requires that everyone contributes their fair share through taxation.
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introduction
Consider using a quote or a rhetorical question in the introduction to make it more engaging.
style
Although the essay is well-structured, varying sentence structures can make it more dynamic and interesting.
structure
The essay has a very clear logical structure and the main points are well supported.
structure
The introduction and conclusion are both present and effectively frame the essay.
content
The argument is robust and clearly explains the necessity of taxes with relevant and specific examples.
coherence cohesion
Coherence and cohesion are excellent; each paragraph flows logically into the next.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • contribute
  • welfare
  • public services
  • progressive taxation
  • distribution of wealth
  • civic duty
  • social cohesion
  • tax evasion
  • economic disparities
  • social unrest
  • individual rights
  • societal responsibilities
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