When choosing a job, the salary is the most important consideration. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own experience or knowledge. Write at least 250 words.

In today’s modern society, most
of
Change preposition
apply
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young people take
money
into consideration when they apply to companies, who think it is the most important. In my opinion, I totally agree with
this
idea. The main reason that
money
plays
significant
Add an article
a significant
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role in our
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
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is
because
Replace the word
that
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it affects many
side
Change to a plural noun
sides
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of life
such
as
own
Correct pronoun usage
our own
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passion, life quality and
self value
Add a hyphen
self-value
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. Specifically, if we have
money
, we can freely pursue our dreams without restriction.
Secondly
, our family will live in happiness, not worry about financial resources.
Finally
, they
want
Add the particle
want to
show examples
enhance their self-worth by trying to earn
money
, not being dependent on anyone,
being
Correct word choice
and being
show examples
financially independent. Because of those things
help
Verb problem
apply
show examples
us
Correct pronoun usage
we
show examples
have a lot of
self-motivated
Correct your spelling
self-motivation
show examples
.
Submitted by lyhuongclc on

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task achievement
Provide more detailed examples to support your main points. For instance, mention how a specific high-paying job can support one's passion or ensure quality of life.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph is clearly connected to the next. Transition words and phrases, like 'Furthermore' or 'On the other hand,' can help guide the reader through your arguments.
coherence cohesion
Structure your essay with distinct paragraphs for the introduction, body, and conclusion. Concluding with a summary of your main points and a restatement of your opinion will give your essay a more rounded finish.
task achievement
The essay clearly states an opinion and provides reasons for why salary is the most important consideration when choosing a job.
task achievement
Good use of specific reasons such as financial independence and pursuing dreams to support your stance.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • consideration
  • sole factor
  • financial stability
  • security
  • motivating factor
  • dissatisfaction
  • demotivation
  • job satisfaction
  • overall well-being
  • fulfillment
  • work-life balance
  • flexible working hours
  • vacations
  • career growth opportunities
  • skill development
  • advancement
  • determining factor
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