IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

More and more tasks we do at home and at work these days are done by robots. Is this a positive or negative development ?

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It is true that nowadays
robots
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conducting
Wrong verb form
conduct
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 many missions, which
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
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 done at
home
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 and at
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workplace
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the workplace
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 rather than by
human-beings
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human beings
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. In
this
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 essay, the writer
believe
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believes
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 that
this
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 trend has a detrimental impact on the employment of workers and isolated depression.
To begin
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 with, it must be acknowledged that the enhancement of technological achievement is increasing powerfully in the modern age. Developing
in
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apply
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artificial technology might lead to a rise in unemployment because of
replacing
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the replacement
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 by
robots
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 and machines.
This
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 is
due to
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 the accuracy and efficiency of
robots
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, which can foster a sense of high productivity in comparison with blue collars.
For instance
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, self-driving vehicles cause redundancy in driving jobs
such
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 as lorry drivers, taxi drivers and bus drivers, which can lead
a
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to a
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sedentary lifestyle as people are out of money and do not have a stable salary to earn a living.
Thus
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, technical
robots
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able
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are able
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 to take
job
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jobs
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 away from humans, which causes unemployment
to
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for
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 a number of
individuals
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 around the world. Another point that should be considered is that replacing
robots
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 at
home
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 or at
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workplace
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the workplace
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 can pose a risk to the isolation between
individuals
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 in
digital
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the digital
a digital
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 era. As a great deal of workload
are
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is
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 solved by technological applications
such
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 as
robots
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, there is an
increasing
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increase
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 in the number of
individuals
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become
Correct pronoun usage
who become
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 unemployed,
therefore
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 preventing them from interacting with their colleagues.
This
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 results in an isolation between human
relationship
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relationships
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 and
also
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reduce
Correct subject-verb agreement
reduces
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 the ability to work properly in both
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home
Correct article usage
the home
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 and
workplace
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.
Furthermore
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, it can cause a rise in a variety of health problems
such
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 as cardiovascular or heart attack, high cholesterol or even respiratory disease because workers not
employ
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employed
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 in a regular way as they used to. In conclusion, using
robots
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 at
home
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 and
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workplace
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the workplace
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 to accomplish missions not only
cause
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causes
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 the redundancy of
individuals
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 but
also
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put
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puts
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 our
living
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lives
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into
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under
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a
Correct article usage
apply
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threat as
it
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they
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 can make
decision
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decisions
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 without human oversight.

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task achievement
Your arguments are clear, but make sure to provide more specific and varied examples to fully support your points. This will enhance the strength of your essay.
coherence cohesion
There are some grammatical errors and awkward phrases in the essay. Proofreading can help in identifying and rectifying these issues, which can improve clarity and reduce misunderstandings.
coherence cohesion
Organize your ideas in a more logical manner. Ensure that each paragraph focuses on one main idea and that there is a smooth transition between paragraphs. This will help in improving the overall structure.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion effectively frame the essay and provide a clear standpoint on the topic.
task achievement
The essay covers both potential negative impacts on employment and social interaction, demonstrating a balanced approach to the topic.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Automation
  • Artificial intelligence (AI)
  • Humanoid
  • Machine learning
  • Task allocation
  • Operational costs
  • Manual labor
  • Disruptive technology
  • Ergonomics
  • Unemployment
  • Cybersecurity
  • Technological singularity
  • Redundant workforce
  • Innovation
  • Ethical considerations
What to do next:
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