Some people believe that climate has the greatest effect on people's way of life. Other believe that the economy of the region has the greatest effect. Discuss both view and give your opinion.
Some individuals argue that climate has a huge
effect
in
people's way Change preposition
on
life
, Change preposition
of life
while
other
argue that the economy of the region has the biggest Fix the agreement mistake
others
effect
. In this
essay
I will discuss both Add a comma
essay,
view
and outline my own opinion.
First Change to a plural noun
views
off
all, It Replace the word
of
well-known
fact that huge changes in climate Add an article
a well-known
effect
our Correct your spelling
affect
life
in good
way and Change the article
a good
helped
us to have a good Wrong verb form
help
life
. for exmaple
, in the past people Correct your spelling
example
were working
in hard conditions to provide for their families like Wrong verb form
worked
being
working in hot and humid weather, but nowadays with Unnecessary verb
apply
the
new innovations like A/C we can do the same work but in Correct article usage
apply
Correct article usage
a confortable
confortable
environment.
Correct your spelling
comfortable
Secondly
, There is no doubt that the economy has a great effect
on our way of living. For instance
, many governments started to invest more in their regions like building new museums, sporting facilities, and public services, and encouraging local investors to contribute to the society by opening new restaurants and coffee shops to attract more tourists.
In conclusion, I firmly beileve
that both climate and Correct your spelling
believe
Correct article usage
the economy
economy
region Replace the word
economic
has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
effected
our Correct your spelling
affected
life
dramatically, Fix the agreement mistake
lives
becuase
of the bad weather there Correct your spelling
because
was
many innovations that made us tackle Change the verb form
were
this
obstacle. meanwhileAdd a comma
,
governments
funding and Fix the agreement mistake
government
investing
in regions Replace the word
investment
has
made Correct subject-verb agreement
have
individuals
Change noun form
individuals'
individual's
life
more comfortable and worth living.Fix the agreement mistake
lives
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grammar
Improve grammatical accuracy and punctuation. For instance, "First off all" should be "First of all" and "effect our life in good way" should be "affect our lives positively."
content
Work on extending your ideas fully. Some points were a bit general and could benefit from more elaboration. For example, expanding on how governments' investments directly impact individuals' lives could strengthen your argument.
vocabulary
Vary your vocabulary and sentence structures more to make your writing more engaging. For example, instead of repeatedly using 'effect', try synonyms like 'impact', 'influence', or 'shape'.
task response
The essay covers both viewpoints and provides a balanced discussion. This is good for task achievement as it ensures a comprehensive response.
structure
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which aids in coherence and cohesion.
examples
The examples given, such as those related to innovations like A/C and local investments, are relevant to the points being made.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.