the most important aim of science should be to improve people's lives
We are standing at the early dawn of a developed world, so most residents believe technology and science's vital purpose should be to develop people's quality of life.
This
essay will present some reasons why I am convinced.
On the one hand, scientific research has created innovations and improvements in society, and thanks to it, the inhabitant's life has been improved. Can mentioned as new findings in fields such
as communication, transportation, or healthcare. Take communication for example
, many decades ago, people had to send letters if they wanted to talk with someone. And that method took lots of time to give to others. But with the appearance of smartphones, now all the population can connect with their friends or family conveniently and easily. Besides
, technologies are also
profoundly impacted on the pharmaceutical. For instance
, not far away, Covid-19 has caused fear worldwide because anyone who is infected with it, may 100% die. Luckily, scientists created the vaccines to deal with this
disease.
On the other hand
, some issues need to be paid attention such
as global warming, environmental pollution, overpopulation, and climate change. For example
, nowadays, the number of people born in the world rocketed to beyond control. Therefore
, this
will lead to the overuse of fossil fuel resources to respond to human needs. Additionally
, the environment may be polluted seriously, and endangered species with their habitats can disappear. As a result
, researchers should plan strategies to manage the born of each household.
In conclusion, I agree with the opinion that science should be developed to improve life. Maybe there are some opposite opinions with me. But remember that the important thing is that using technology is effective in society and our lives.Submitted by ieltswritingpracticedl on
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task achievement
You clearly articulate your main points and provide relevant examples. However, some parts of your argument could be more developed. For example, you could elaborate further on how scientific advancements in different fields directly improve people's lives.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a reasonably clear structure with an introduction and conclusion. Nonetheless, there are a few sections where the flow of ideas could be smoother. Consider using transitional phrases to enhance coherence between your paragraphs.
coherence cohesion
You have a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps frame your argument effectively.
task achievement
Your essay includes specific examples, like the invention of smartphones and vaccines, which support your main points well.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?
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