Government should make people responsible for looking after their own local environment. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Environmental care is an essential issue to minimize natural disasters, keep
air
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the air
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clean and ensure human health. So the
environment
is very important to us and not only the
government
needs to take care of it but the people
also
need to do it. First of all, I want to say that the
government
also
needs to have a responsibility to care for and protect the
environment
,
such
as needing to support,
provide
Correct word choice
and provide
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finance, and labor tools so that localities can work. More effective.
In addition
, the
Government
needs to propagate and introduce appropriate policies to protect the
environment
, balance the ecosystem and improve the living
environment
of creatures in general and humans
in particular
. Not only that, the
government
There
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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needs to be strict
handling
Change preposition
in handling
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measures for cases of destruction of environmental resources and public property.
On the other hand
, people
also
need to be responsible for the surrounding
environment
by doing things
such
as not throwing trash, dumping trash in the right place, and collecting trash.
In addition
, each person needs to increase responsibility and awareness in protecting the
environment
such
as
: do
Verb problem
apply
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not
cut
Wrong verb form
cutting
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down forests or
destroy
Wrong verb form
destroying
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the
environment
indiscriminately.
Instead
Add a comma
Instead,
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we should plant more trees to make the
environment
greener and fresher. We should
also
prioritize using recycled products and limit the use of plastic bags.
Finally
, everyone needs to raise awareness and join hands to protect the
environment
and consciously create a more clean and better living
environment
.
Submitted by lyhuongclc on

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task achievement
You have adequately addressed the task by discussing both the government's and individuals' roles in environmental protection. However, your examples and points could be more detailed. Providing specific cases or more concrete examples would strengthen your argument.
coherence cohesion
While your essay is logically structured, the transition between ideas can be further improved. Using more transitional phrases could enhance the flow of your essay.
structure
Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps in understanding your main points and overall argument.
content
The ideas presented in your essay are clear and mostly comprehensive. You have made valid points about the roles of both the government and individuals in protecting the environment.

Your opinion

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Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

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...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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