Many museums charge for admission while others are free. Do you think the advantages of charging people for admission to museums outweigh the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. Write at least 250 words.

#museums #charge #admission #people

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Talking to the issue of whether the upsides of many

museums

charge

Wrong verb form

charging

show examples

people

for the entry fee

while

the other

museums

are free to

visit

outhweigh

Correct your spelling

outweigh

outweighs

the downsides or not is a controversial one. The following essay will illustrate two of the principal reasons why I personally don't believe.

According to

basic knowledge, there is no admission fee for European

students

visit

the one of famous

museums

in France, which is named Louvre.

Firstly

Louvre

Correct article usage

the Louvre

show examples

doesn't

charge

any fee for European

students

but

adults

Change preposition

for adults

show examples

, there are still a lot of

people

want

Correct pronoun usage

who want

show examples

to go to

visit

this

museum,

they

Correct word choice

but they

show examples

still have to earn some money to employ some managers,

securities

Fix the agreement mistake

security

show examples

, and cleaners to maintain the

enviroment

Correct your spelling

environment

and safety.

However

, all of these jobs should belong to

government

Correct article usage

the government

show examples

management field because

this

is about education.

Secondly

, if local

students

want to

visit

the other

museums

have to spend a lot of money to buy the tickets, but in my opinion, I

would

Verb problem

apply

show examples

believe that the

government

could have taken advantage of the

residents

Change to a genitive case

resident's

residents'

show examples

taxes to afford these payments.

Nevertheless

, some

people

might think it makes sense to pay some if you want to learn something which is extracurricular, it is an indisputable thing. I think the way what Louvre did is the best because

Change preposition

apply

show examples

they only

charge

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

foreigners and other

people

who are not

european

Change the capitalization

European

show examples

students

. Foreigners didn't pay any fees to the local

government

and the

government

could merely focus on the local

students

, so it will make that having extra profits to afford all of the human resources and help education get better at the same time.

To sum up

, everything has two opposite sides, as

what

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

I mentioned, I personally do not think the pros of

charge

Change the verb form

charging

show examples

people

for admission to

museums

outweigh the disadvantages .

Submitted by eddie910208 on Thu Jun 13 2024

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task achievement

Ensure that your introduction clearly presents your opinion. Currently, it is somewhat vague and could be more concise.

coherence cohesion

Develop your ideas more clearly and cohesively. Some sentences are a bit difficult to follow and could benefit from smoother transitions.

task achievement

Include more specific examples and elaborations to support your points. This will make your argument more persuasive and clear.

task achievement

You have a clear understanding of the topic and have provided relevant examples, like the Louvre.

coherence cohesion

Your conclusion effectively summarizes your main points.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
6
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
16
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

301 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Admission fee
Revenue stream
Maintenance
Overcrowding
Commercialization
Cultural heritage
Diverse attendance
Community ownership
Access to culture
Visitor experience
Exhibit quality
Cultural mission
Reliance on funding
Government subsidies
Cultural accessibility

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Many museums charge for admission while others are free. Do you think the advantages of charging people for admission to museums outweigh the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. Write at least 250 words.

Fully explain your ideas

Some people view teenage conflict with their parents as a necessary part of growing up, whilst others see it as something negative which should be avoided. Discuss both the views and give your own opinion.

Young people are often influenced in their behaviors by others in the same age group. Some argue that peer pressure is important while others feel it has distinct disadvantages. Do the disadvantages of peer pressure outweigh the advantages?

Many people in poor countries die from diseases that are curable because they cannot afford the medication required. Do you believe that drug companies should make their products available at reduced prices in these countries?

Children brought up in families with less money are better prepared for life than those from wealthy families. To what extent do you agree or disagree?