IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

The chart below shows the proportions of adults in Canada who own one car, two cars, more than two cars, or who do not own a car.

The chart below shows the proportions of adults in Canada who own one car, two cars, more than two cars, or who do not own a car.
#proportions #adults #canada #car #two #cars
The pie chart shows the proportion of adult
car
 owners, in Canada, in terms of how many
cars
 they own.
Overall
,
it is clear that
 most of the Canadian adult population
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
show examples
 ownership of
cars
;
however
, a majority of them only have one
car
. Over 50% of the people
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
have ownership of a single
car
, in Canada,
while
 the percentage of people owning two
cars
 is not greater than 25%. That being said, the figure for two
cars
 is the second highest, right after the figure for one
car
. Moving on to the remaining 25% of the chart,
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
belongs to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
individuals who have no
cars
 and three or more
cars
. It is evident from the chart that people owning more than two
cars
 account for the lowest proportion,
of
Change preposition
at
show examples
 about 10%.
Finally
, approximately one-sixth of the adults in Canada do not have any
cars
 of their own.
Submitted by sajeendranrajakumar on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Vocabulary: Replace the words car, cars with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "shows" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
▼

You are not ready for IELTS Speaking, if you

  • Can’t speak smoothly without pauses.
  • Use simple words and lack vocabulary.
  • Feel nervous and anxious when speaking.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Proportion
  • Percentage
  • Ownership
  • Trend
  • Urban
  • Rural
  • Public transportation
  • Environmental impact
  • Government policies
  • Subsidy
  • Electric cars
  • Cultural attitudes
  • Income level
  • Economic factors
  • Technological advancement
What to do next:
Look at other essays:

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!