IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Creative artists should always be given the freedom to express their own ideas (in word, picture, music or films) in whichever way they wish. There should be no government restrictions on what they do. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

#artists #freedom #word #picture #music #films #government #restrictions
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
opinions are divided on whether producers of
art
 projects need any attention from anyone. many argue that politicians should not pay attention to those professionals who can help them
to
Verb problem
apply
show examples
absorb the
art
 inspirations.
This
 writer completely agrees with
this
 viewpoint. it can be true that
artists
 need a lot of time to find inspiration which can help them to improve their own skills or the quality of pictures. most of the inspiration will come at a special time during a normal day,
artists
' emotions play an important role in creating a wonderful painting.
therefore
, having a capable of self-control in daily life is the best way to express their idea.
for example
, most of the most famous pictures in the world come from the improvisation of the
artists
. if they had not been free in their lives, those wonderful pictures could not have been created.
therefore
, if there is any intervention from the
government
, the abilities of
artists
 will be restrained and the
artictist
Correct your spelling
artistic
artist
 systems will
also
 be destroyed. The
government
 will have many different things to take
careof
Correct your spelling
care of
, so they must pay attention to all of the opinions of the citizens.
therefore
, many
artists
 cannot show their own ego in
art
 which is controlled by the
government
 to satisfy residents. it can be seen that
there
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
some
talent
Replace the word
talented
show examples
artists
 feel very upset
due to
 the ambition of the
government
 to have a stable place in the world. in conclusion,
art
 is a kind of activities that support the creation and imagination of each person, so it is unnecessary for the
government
 to prevent
artists
 if they are not doing
any things
Correct your spelling
anything
show examples
 unlegal.
Submitted by [email protected] on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task response
Strengthen the clarity of ideas by adding more specific examples and explanations. For instance, discuss particular instances where governmental restrictions led to a suppression of artistic creativity.
coherence cohesion
Improve coherence by using more transitional phrases or conjunctions to smoothly connect paragraphs and ideas. This will make your argument more persuasive and easier to follow.
task response
The essay provides a clear perspective on the topic, advocating for the freedom of artists and emphasizing the potential negative impact of government intervention.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a straightforward structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, making it easy to follow.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: