Your friend is about to celebrate a landmark birthday and would welcome suggestions as to how it should be celebrated. Write a letter to your friend. In your letter • say what type of party should be held e.g. themed, fancy dress, black tie event • suggest a suitable venue • make recommendations as to entertainment e.g. DJ, jazz band

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Dear Joseph,
Last
week I got an E-mail from you. In that
mail
Correct your spelling
email
show examples
, you asked
some
Change preposition
for some
show examples
recommdations
Correct your spelling
recommendations
about the
birthday
celebrations. Next month your
son
Change noun form
son's
show examples
first
birthday
is coming and you are planning to celebrate that party tremendously. Here, I give some suggestions.
Firstly
, all
party
Fix the agreement mistake
parties
show examples
should
be conduct
Change the verb form
conduct
show examples
some competitions
then
only that event will make them happy for all participants. To illustrate,
Change preposition
at my
show examples
my
Change preposition
at my
show examples
cousins
Change to a genitive case
cousin's
cousins'
show examples
Change noun form
daughter's
show examples
daughter
Change noun form
daughter's
show examples
birthday
Fix the agreement mistake
event
show examples
events
Fix the agreement mistake
event
show examples
there was a puzzle competition
Correct subject-verb agreement
were
show examples
was
Correct subject-verb agreement
were
show examples
organized and prices
also
Add a missing verb
were also
show examples
awarded
Change preposition
apply
show examples
at
Change preposition
apply
show examples
two ago. Here, you can try to arrange dance
competition
Fix the agreement mistake
competitions
show examples
, because
this
make
Change the verb form
makes
show examples
them enjoyable for all.
Secondly
, the best place to conduct
this
party is
hotel
Capitalize word
Hotel
show examples
Maris
this
is a 3-star hotel and the first floor contains a large hall and it can
accommadate
Correct your spelling
accommodate
more than one hundred
person
Change to a plural noun
people
show examples
at one time.
Moreover
, our company
had
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
conducted
business
Add an article
a business
show examples
meeting
last
year at
this
hotel
with
Change preposition
at
show examples
the
Correct article usage
an
show examples
affordable rate.
Finally
, all parties typically conduct some music show, because
this
type
event
Change preposition
of event
show examples
can make the guests feel more relaxed and comfortable.
Hence
consider
this
can
Verb problem
apply
show examples
be possible to arrange
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
your
son
Change noun form
son's
show examples
birthday
celebration. Kindly, consider my advice and I will come with my family. Best Regards Thomas.
Submitted by smsundaram57 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion
Ensure each paragraph focuses on a single main idea to improve clarity.
task achievement
Pay attention to grammatical accuracy and sentence structure to enhance readability.
task achievement
The letter has a friendly and welcoming tone, which is appropriate for writing to a friend.
coherence cohesion
The letter contains a clear greeting and closing, making it easy to follow the structure.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • milestone birthday
  • themed party
  • fancy dress
  • black-tie event
  • elegant
  • sophisticated
  • atmosphere
  • venue
  • rooftop
  • cozy
  • trendy
  • garden venue
  • DJ
  • live jazz band
  • interactive entertainment
  • photo booth
  • magician
What to do next:
Look at other essays: