The table below shows the numbers of visitors to Ashdown Museum during the year before and the year after it was refurbished. The charts show the result of surveys asking visitors how satisfied they were with their visit, during the same two periods. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

#numbers #visitors #ashdown #museum #year #show #surveys #visit #two #periods #summarise #information #features #comparisons

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The table illustrates the information about travellers coming to visit Ashdown Museum throughout the prior and following year that it was developed. The charts present the percentage of observations which is how visitors responded

while

Linking Words

visiting through the two different periods.

Overall

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, it can be seen that the resulting number of tourists was higher after the museum renovation.

Moreover

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, there were more satisfactory feelings and less disappointed thoughts afterwards development. Looking at the year before development, the total figures of tourists visiting

this

Linking Words

museum accounted for 74,000. The

further

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is that satisfaction and extremely satisfied were merely 30 and 15, respectively. It can be witnessed that people

disappointed

Add a missing verb

were disappointed

show examples

and a dramatic dissatisfaction, with the figures being a majority proportion at 40 and 10, orderly. Post following period, the sum of travellers is a significant increase of 22,000.

Moreover

Linking Words

, it can be observed that many people agree that satisfied and greatly pleased by 10 and 20, in order.

In addition

Linking Words

, unsatisfactory and extremely unpleased feelings are lesser than

last

Linking Words

year, with the figure being from 40 to 15 and from 10 to 5, respectively.

Finally

Linking Words

observants

Change the capitalization

Observants

show examples

ignore to be responsive as the same as the period before refurbishment.

Submitted by arunrak.wk on Thu Jun 13 2024

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "moreover".

▼

Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.

Vocabulary: The word "figures" was used 3 times.

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8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

197 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

refurbishment
visitor numbers
satisfaction levels
very satisfied
satisfied
neither satisfied nor dissatisfied
dissatisfied
very dissatisfied
survey results
comparison
impact
effectiveness
visitor experience
overall improvement
increase/decrease in visitors
positive feedback
negative feedback
visitor survey
survey period

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