IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

To succeed in a business, one needs to know math, rather than soft skills and luck. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Many people nowadays have a tendency to open a
company
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 and run their own
business
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, especially when they are born
in
Change preposition
into
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 a well-off family,
having
Wrong verb form
have
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 a quite considerable amount of money and be swayed or even defrauded by other people.
However
Linking Words
, some people do not know what abilities they need to pick up to do well in trading . From my standpoint, both mathematics,
Use synonyms
softskill
Correct your spelling
soft skill
soft-skill
soft skills
 and good fortune are necessary factors that we ought to anticipate before setting up a
business
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. As a matter of fact,
business
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 means the activity of buying and selling goods and services,
assosiate
Correct your spelling
associate
associated
 inseparably with math.
Therefore
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, a
business
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person
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 will probably have to know how to control the profits and
loss
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losses
show examples
 of their
company
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 by using intricate math
operation
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operations
show examples
.
For instance
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, some specialized methods can be applied in order to calculate the money that the
company
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 have invested and
shrinked
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shrunk
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 back every month.
In addition
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, finance plays a determinant role in running a
company
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, so it will be vital for the directors to have the
capabilities
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capability
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 to decide how much money their companies should spend on various aspects.
As a result
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, without mathematical mastery, a
person
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 can hardly maintain and be successful in
business
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.
On the other hand
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, it is undeniable that
Use synonyms
softskill
Correct your spelling
soft skill
soft-skill
 and luck are
also
Linking Words
 needed to be a victorious
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business
Correct your spelling
businessperson
show examples
person
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. Being a director
do
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does
show examples
 not mean that it is unnecessary for us to learn
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softskill
Correct your spelling
soft skill
soft skills
such
Linking Words
 as communicating or persuading. To illustrate, a leader in a
company
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 has to communicate and get on well with other officers or workers to achieve the
company
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's goals or mission together without any arguments that may affect the result pessimistically. What is more, as the
economy
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economic
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 market fluctuates continuously, we sometimes need to have some good fortune. It is difficult for us to predict the change
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
 the market exactly, so luck may turn the tables on the odd
occasions
Fix the agreement mistake
occasion
show examples
. From what
have
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has
show examples
 been analyzed above, I may come to the conclusion that math,
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softskill
Correct your spelling
soft skill
soft-skill
soft skills
 and luck are three things that a
person
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need
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needs
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 to
Add a missing verb
be prepared
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prepared
Wrong verb form
prepare
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 conscientiously on condition that they have
a
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the
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 desire to be a
star-up
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start-up
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. The way I see it is that specialized skills should be made ready meticulously to evade going bankrupt, being deeply in debt or even suicide just because lacking of knowledge and the
eager
Replace the word
eagerness
show examples
 to learn.

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task achievement
The overall response addresses the topic well, acknowledging that math, soft skills, and luck all play important roles in business success. However, making specific and clearer connections between these elements in the body paragraphs can enhance the argument. More specific examples and data would strengthen your response.
coherence cohesion
Ensure logical flow by linking ideas more cohesively. Use transition phrases like 'Furthermore,' 'Moreover,' and 'On the contrary,' to guide the reader through your arguments. Improve the linkage between sentences and paragraphs for greater coherence.
task achievement
The essay's introduction effectively sets up the discussion on key factors necessary for succeeding in business, clearly stating the importance of math, soft skills, and luck.
coherence cohesion
The conclusion successfully wraps up the essay by reinforcing the main points discussed, offering a well-rounded summary.
Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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