Some countries have become much richer than others.Richer countries should now help poorer countries. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Some say that advanced
countries
should
support
poorer nations. I strongly agree with
this
statement because of several reasons. The main reason is that the
support
from the former benefits the victims of natural disasters, which helps to protect victims’ human rights.
This
is mainly because when
the
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apply
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natural disasters occur, the former has heavy equipment and experts to engage in rescue actions.
For example
,
the
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apply
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transportation planes can carry emergency tents from big
countries
to the victims of earthquakes.
Additionally
, the former has cutting-edge science and technology to
support
the latter to assist with addressing the humanitarian crisis.
For instance
, in the pandemic, China sent
considerably
Change the word
considerable
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vaccines to the southeastern Asian
countries
, and these medicines are essential for the survival of the old. Another consideration is that the people who are in poverty and starving can get humanitarian aid from wealthy
countries
.
This
is mainly because the poor in small
countries
cannot always depend on
the
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apply
show examples
aid from the United Nations;
instead
, the wealthier
countries
should make loans to the poorer ones so that the latter
co uld
Correct your spelling
could
show examples
invest in infrastructures, particularly the highway grid and the food factories.
As a result
,
the
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apply
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massive
product
Fix the agreement mistake
products
show examples
such
as bread and milk could prevent the unemployed from
being
Unnecessary verb
apply
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starving. In conclusion, I firmly believe that immediate
support
from the wealthier
countries
can ease the natural disaster victims and the people suffering from starvation.
This
represents an immediate solution to address famine and humanitarian crises in
the
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apply
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poorer
countries
.
However
, in the long run,
the
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apply
show examples
individuals in less wealthy
countries
should rely on their government and themselves.
Submitted by shaobo_xu on

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task achievement
Extend and elaborate on your arguments for a deeper analysis. Adding more details and examples can help to expand your ideas and show a stronger connection between your main points.
coherence cohesion
Introduce more transitional phrases and linking words to enhance the flow of your essay. This can help to create a clearer and more logical progression between your ideas and paragraphs.
coherence cohesion
You provided a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. This helps in maintaining a logical flow throughout the essay.
task achievement
Your essay includes relevant examples such as the emergency tents and vaccines provided by wealthier countries. These examples help to clarify your points.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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