Some people think that it is necessary to learn about others countries. Other feel same can be learnt through TV and Internet. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #countries #learnt #tv #internet

Undeniable learn new things related to other countries

that is

something interesting. Many people think it is important to visit some states in order to learn about them.

However

, others think it can be found on

and the

Internet

This

essay will discuss both views, and I believe that

and the

Internet

are able to be good choices for learning about other countries.

To begin

with, it could be true that to learn about some

region

Fix the agreement mistake

regions

show examples

citizen

Fix the agreement mistake

citizens

show examples

must travel to the country to get more information about them because they are able to feel immediately the culture of the country when they were staying there.

For instance

human

Fix the agreement mistake

humans

show examples

who have visited some states

such

as China, Spain, etc, and stayed there for several days will know about the daily activities of citizens,

such

as the habits, culture, language, traditional food etc.

Besides

, individuals who travel to other regions

also

gain unforgettable experiences because they are able to make relationships with local people.

On the other hand

, most people prefer to learn about other communities by watching

or looking on the

Internet

because has several advantages.

Firstly

it is more efficient to learn by watching

and

Internet

because It is able to decrease the cost of the journey.

For instance

, entity must spend their money to pay for the tickets and living costs when they live there.

Although

the cost can be allocated to the most important things

such

as education, life necessities, and saving for their future.

In addition

, it is able to save energy for individual, because they no need to go out of their house and only sit on the sofa to learn about other public lives. In conclusion, learning about other land by travel is better, despite it is more beneficial to learn by watching

and the

Internet

because it is more efficient

due to

the economy and saving more energy.

Therefore

, most citizens choose the second statement which is able to allocate their money to another thing.

Submitted by patricius.yohanes on Fri Jun 14 2024

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task achievement

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coherence cohesion

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task achievement

The essay presents a balanced discussion of both views, which is essential for a well-rounded argument in IELTS writing tasks.

coherence cohesion

Your introduction and conclusion are clear and relate directly to the essay topic, which helps the reader understand your main points better.

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14Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

336 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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