Influence of human beings on the world's ecosystem is leading to the extinction of many species & loss of biodioversity. What are the primary causes of loss of ? What solution can be done to to solve it?

Nowadays we are witnesses
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
natural disasters and
species
extinction, that have been caused by human vital activity. Biodiversity is a roof of
survivung
Replace the word
the survival
show examples
of wildlife. Life is a sequence of
species
,
Correct article usage
the extintion
show examples
extintion
Correct your spelling
extinction
of one chain link may lead to
domino
Add an article
a domino
the domino
show examples
effect. That's a reason to maintain the environment in the best state we can. For the first reason
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
loss
Correct article usage
the loss
show examples
of
biodiversity
Add a comma
biodiversity,
show examples
I can note the
devercity
Correct your spelling
severity
of changes in the environment that have been caused by
human
Fix the agreement mistake
humans
show examples
. All the modern technologies are very polluting the atmosphere, water, and soil. Animals and plants are not flexible enough to adapt themself to new conditions, so there are
species
that
endangered
Add a missing verb
are endangered
show examples
or
extincted
Correct your spelling
extinct
.
Secondly
, we can't forget about hunting. Nowadays, in most parts of the world, people have no necessity to hunt
for surviving
Change preposition
to survive
show examples
. Hunting became entertainment much more than it was in past centuries. Hunters are not thinking about
species
and
veriety
Correct your spelling
variety
, they are playing gods. It's especially noticeable in
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
countries with weak laws in
this
area.
For
Change preposition
In
show examples
conclusion, I want to talk about solutions. Formerly we need to improve
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
manufacturing all over the world to minimize polluting and development of the environment to maximize the
surviving
Replace the word
survival
show examples
of
species
.
Furthermore
, governments all over the world have to
adopte
Correct your spelling
adopt
the international laws of hunting and preservation of wildlife. And each of us
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
to take part in saving our planet.
Submitted by anastasia on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
To improve task response, ensure that specific examples are provided to support your points. For instance, mention particular species that have gone extinct due to pollution or hunting to strengthen your argument.
coherence cohesion
For better coherence and cohesion, work on the clarity and organization of each paragraph. Connect your ideas more fluidly using appropriate linking words and phrases. Consider using transitions to guide the reader through your argument smoothly.
coherence cohesion
Try to make your introduction more explicit by clearly defining what you will discuss in the essay. Similarly, in your conclusion, summarize the main points more succinctly to reinforce your argument.
task achievement
The essay addresses the prompt by discussing both the causes of biodiversity loss and potential solutions, showing a complete response to the task.
coherence cohesion
There are clear main points in each paragraph, making the essay easy to follow. The provided solutions are practical and relevant.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Ultimate Speaking practice for IELTS

Practice speaking step by step, answer real-life questions, and build your confidence. Start your free trial and improve your speaking skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays:

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!