IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

You missed an international flight due to a problem at the airport. Write a letter to the airline. In your letter: Describe what happened that caused you to miss your flight Explain how missing your flight impacted you Clearly state what you would like the airline to do

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Dear Sir or Madam, I am Kiranpreet Kaur and I am writing about an unexpected
flight
Use synonyms
 cancellation at the airport which affected my work schedule. When I arrived at Frankfurt Airport to board the
flight
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 to San
Franscisco
Correct your spelling
Francisco
,CA
in
Change preposition
on
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flight
Use synonyms
 number SF120, they told all the passengers that the plane
has
Wrong verb form
had
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 a problem and technicians
are
Wrong verb form
were
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 trying to
fix
Correct pronoun usage
fix it
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.
However
Linking Words
, after waiting for 6
hour
Change to a plural noun
hours
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 they told us that
this
Linking Words
flight
Use synonyms
cannot
Wrong verb form
could not
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 be boarded because of
the
Correct article usage
a
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 technical issue.
Due to
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
 missed
flight
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, my whole plan of attending a conference
are seeming
Wrong verb form
seems
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 jeopardized. I need to reach there in a week and I am not able to find any other
flight
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 because of
rush
Correct article usage
the rush
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 in summer vacation. All flights are overbooked and it's looking impossible to get anything in
this
Linking Words
 short period. Please provide me
a
Add the preposition
with a
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backup
flight
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 because I am in an urgent situation.
Otherwise
Linking Words
, please refund me the double of the costs I paid
initially
Linking Words
. As of now, I
am having
Wrong verb form
have
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 some options that are almost twice the charges of a normal
flight
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. I hope you will respond promptly to it. Yours faithfully, Kiranpreet Kaur

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task achievement
The sequence of events is clear, but more detailed information and precise explanations can enhance clarity. For example, explaining what 'my whole plan of attending a conference' entails could provide better insight.
coherence cohesion
Consider using more transition words to connect sentences and paragraphs smoothly. For instance, using phrases such as 'As a result,' 'Furthermore,' or 'In addition' can create a more fluid narrative.
task achievement
The tone is polite and formal, which is suitable for this type of letter.
coherence cohesion
Each paragraph focuses on a single aspect of the situation, contributing to a clear structure.
coherence cohesion
The closing and greeting are appropriately structured, providing a professional end to the letter.
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