IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Some people believe that teaching children at home is best for a child’s development while others think that it is important for children to go to school. Discuss the advantages of both methods and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. You have now reached the end of your Writing test; download the answers and see how well you have done.

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Whilst some caregivers think that home
education
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 is better for
children
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 as they give more attention
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
 their
children
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more
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
than regular schools,others think that regular
education
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 can be more
benificial
Correct your spelling
beneficial
 for learners.
in
Capitalize word
In
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 my humble opinion ,
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 think regular teaching
method
Fix the agreement mistake
methods
show examples
 are better
on
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in
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 many ways
specially
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especially
show examples
 on social levels. On one hand,some
parents
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thinks
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think
show examples
 that protecting their
Fix the agreement mistake
offspring
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offsprings
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offspring
show examples
 through avoiding interacting with students who can change their
children
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's
behaviour
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 and their
Correct your spelling
attitude
attiude
Correct your spelling
attitude
.
Linking Words
Capitalize word
For
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for
Capitalize word
For
show examples
 instance,shy
childrens
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children
show examples
 after going to
Fix the agreement mistake
school
show examples
schools
Fix the agreement mistake
school
show examples
,
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
 develop
Correct article usage
an aggressive
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aggressive
Correct article usage
an aggressive
show examples
Correct your spelling
attitude
attiude
Correct your spelling
attitude
Change preposition
apply
show examples
for
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apply
show examples
sometimes and their change in
behaviour
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 can
last
Linking Words
 for years.What can be said is that aggressive
behaviour
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 that learners can develop through interacting with each
others
Change to a singular noun
other
show examples
 can be the reason for
parents
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 to avoid regular
schools pathway
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school pathways
show examples
.
On the other hand
Linking Words
,most caregivers
perfer
Correct your spelling
prefer
traditional
Correct article usage
the traditional
show examples
 way of
education
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 as it
develop
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develops
show examples
 a lot of social
behaviour
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experience
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experiences
show examples
 for their
offsprings
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offspring
show examples
 that they can not meet
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
 home.
Thus
Linking Words
,most
parents
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 push their
children
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 to go to school to learn subjects
as well as
Linking Words
Use synonyms
behaviour
Replace the word
behavioural
show examples
 traits.An example
for
Change preposition
of
show examples
 that,
learners
Add a missing verb
is learners
show examples
 at school develop a way of interacting with each
others
Change to a singular noun
other
show examples
 and
form
Wrong verb form
forming
show examples
 circles and they can meet friends.
Such
Linking Words
 traits are
pricless
Correct your spelling
priceless
 and hardly to find these traits in
home educated
Add a hyphen
home-educated
show examples
 pupils.
Finally
Linking Words
,after reviewing both ideas that people may have towards both
self
Add a hyphen
self-education
show examples
education
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 and traditional way of
education
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,I can easily say that with some guidance and
carefull
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careful
carefully
 teaching
methods
Add a comma
methods,
show examples
 teachers can easily change all
educators
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educator's
educators'
show examples
behaviour
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 to get
postive
Correct your spelling
positive
 outcomes.
Thus
Linking Words
,no need for
parents
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 to educate their
children
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on
Change preposition
at
show examples
homes
Fix the agreement mistake
home
show examples
 as
students
Change the noun form
student
show examples
 interaction is very
crutial
Correct your spelling
crucial
critical
specially
Replace the word
especially
show examples
 when it comes to shaping their behaviours.

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task achievement
You have addressed the task and given some advantages for both methods of education. However, make sure to elaborate more on both sides to provide a complete perspective.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. You have also presented your opinion. Ensure each paragraph is well-developed with more supporting details and examples.
presentation
Pay attention to your grammar and sentence structure to improve clarity. Also, ensure to check for spelling and punctuation errors to make your argument more persuasive.
coherence cohesion
It's great that you clearly stated your opinion in the introduction and conclusion!
task achievement
Your essay demonstrates an awareness of the importance of social interactions in traditional schooling.
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