Throughout history, people have dreamed to live in a perfect society while they haven't agreed how what the ideal society would be like. What do you think is the most important element of a perfect society in the modern world? What can people do to achieve an ideal society?

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It is sometimes argued that
perfect
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a perfect
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society cannot exist. I completely agree that high-level life could be able by several items and
human
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humans
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do the major role to achieve that
gool
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goal
.
Firstly
,
strong
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a strong
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education could prevent ignorance which means big
confident
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confidence
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.
For example
, if
vast
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the vast
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majority have special learning normally they will be more confident about
there
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their
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professionaly
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professional
professionally
career
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careers
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. worthwhile that preserving the environment can
sophistication
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sophisticate
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individuals.
While
people
corporate
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cooperate
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and organize
sociaty
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society
the opportunities for
better
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a better
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life could easily
success
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succeed
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.
On the other hand
, the more
importance
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important
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thing to make a good society is
corporation
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a corporation
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.
To
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For
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intance
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instance
, individuals need to improve themselves first
then
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and then
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assess the bad habit to replace it with beneficial
one
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ones
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such
as repeatedly
useing
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using
the
Correct article usage
apply
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plastic bags to reusing paper
product
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products
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so they can
reducing
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reduce
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the impact of claimant change.
Also
, learning languages to tackle the issues to understand
foreigners
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foreign
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people. In conclusion,
high quality
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high-quality
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life
want
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wants
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many
criteria's
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criteria
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and I would argue that people have to
promoted
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promote
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schemes to live in
ideal
Correct article usage
an ideal
show examples
sociaty
Correct your spelling
society
.
Submitted by shahad.san966 on

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task achievement
Work on grammatical accuracy. There are several grammatical errors that affect readability (e.g., 'cannot exist', 'could be able by').
task achievement
Improve vocabulary and word choice to ensure correct usage (e.g., 'high-level life', 'vast majority').
coherence cohesion
Make sure each paragraph stays on topic and that transitions between ideas are smooth.
task achievement
Develop your main points with more detailed examples and explanations to enhance the argument.
task achievement
The essay addresses the prompt by discussing elements of an ideal society and ways to achieve it.
coherence cohesion
Both paragraphs have clear main ideas (education, cooperation) which are relevant to the topic.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

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