Some species of animals are almost extinct; and many others seem to be fast approaching a similar risk. What are the reasons for this? What should be done to solve this problem?

#species #animals #risk

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Nowadays, some wild animals are extinct

while

Linking Words

others are close to the same end. There is a

spefic

Correct your spelling

specific

reason which has

been

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

caused

this

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situation, but there is

also

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a solution. In

this

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essay, I will explain both. The main reason why many animals are extinct is because of global warming.

This

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phenomenon is caused by CO2, when there is

too

Replace the word

show examples

CO2 under the stratosphere, the

earth

Change noun form

earth's

show examples

temperature

is getting

Wrong verb form

gets

show examples

higher and the globe

is starting

Wrong verb form

starts

show examples

to be toxic for the

enevironment

Correct your spelling

environment

and animals that are living in it.

For example

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white

Add an article

the white

a white

show examples

polar bear is

Change the article

show examples

animal specie from

Antartic

Correct your spelling

Antarctica

Antarctic

, where usually they

are use

Change the verb form

are used

are using

show examples

live

Change the verb form

living

show examples

with

Change preposition

show examples

temperature

Fix the agreement mistake

temperatures

show examples

under 0 degrees.

Instead

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due to

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global warming they are suffering because of high degrees.

This

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earth

Change noun form

earth's

show examples

situation

have

Change the verb form

has

show examples

just one solution and it is to reduce CO2

emission

Fix the agreement mistake

emissions

show examples

. In order to do

this

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, people all around the world have to collaborate on

this

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process.

For instance

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, one of the most impact

cause

Fix the agreement mistake

causes

show examples

is CO2 emission from

people

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people's

show examples

vehicles

such

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as cars. Individuals could try to minimize the

roads

Change the noun form

road

show examples

traffic and try to use more public transport,

thus

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this

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way,

less

Change the quantifier

fewer

show examples

vehicles,

less

Change the quantifier

fewer

show examples

emissons

Correct your spelling

emissions

. In conclusion, cars and white polar bears are so different things but thanks to

this

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case it is easy to see how simple it is to destroy an animal

specie

Fix the agreement mistake

species

show examples

apparently so far from humans and civil society. If every person can

Verb problem

play

show examples

a small part in

this

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process, one day

this

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world will be better than now.

Submitted by bucciarellianna3 on Sat Jun 15 2024

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coherence cohesion

To improve the logical structure, ensure that each paragraph focuses on a single main idea and builds upon it logically.

task achievement

Enhance the support for your main points by providing more specific details and examples, beyond the polar bear example.

coherence cohesion

Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which frame your argument well.

task achievement

You addressed both parts of the task, explaining the reason for animal extinction and proposing a solution.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
25
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

252 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

species extinction
endangered animals
biodiversity
habitat loss
deforestation
urbanization
poaching
illegal wildlife trade
climate change
pollution
conservation efforts
legislation
enforcement
human overpopulation
sustainable development
responsible consumption
education
awareness programs
protected areas
wildlife reserves
international cooperation
collaboration

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Some species of animals are almost extinct; and many others seem to be fast approaching a similar risk. What are the reasons for this? What should be done to solve this problem?

Your opinion

Write about the following topic: Is freedom of speech necessary in a free society? Give reasons for your answer.

many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an ageing population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people. To what extent do the advantages of having an ageing population outweigh the disadvantages?

The first smartphone was released in 1992. By then year 2020 there may be as many as 2.5 billion smartphones in the world. The use of smartphones is decreasing our collective intelligence because we are reliant on the technology and not our own minds. To what extent do you agree or disagree?