the use of phones tablets and other devices while walking in public places has been a concern for many commentstors what hazards can arise if people are guided by such devices when walking down the street how could these problems can be solved

The
use
of mobile
phones
has increased these days.
People
not only
use
it in their homes, but
also
they
use
it
while
walking in public places which may cause a lot of problems.
This
essay will discuss the main causes of
this
phenomenon and provide a logical solution. I believe that the reasons are the lack of awareness and the excessive
use
of
devices
. One of the first problems of using
phones
in public places is When individuals are preoccupied with their
devices
, they often fail to notice potential hazards,
such
as oncoming traffic, uneven pavement, or obstacles in their path.Another problem that needs to be considered is that excessive
use
of
devices
in public can lead to a decrease in social interactions and a sense of community, as
people
become more absorbed in their digital worlds.
For example
, the result of conducted research at Glasgow University illustrates that 77% of individuals
use
their mobile
phones
in public places.
Thus
, they can't avoid using
phones
outside. In my opinion, I think that a possible solution to
this
problem would be if the governments could introduce laws to restrict the
use
of electronic
devices
while
walking in certain areas, and launch public awareness campaigns to educate
people
on the dangers.
For instance
, China plays a strong role in
this
problem which leads to reduce the
use
of
phones
.
Furthermore
, cities can implement infrastructural changes like dedicated pedestrian lanes, improved signage, and better lighting to enhance pedestrian safety and minimize distractions.
Therefore
,
this
may make
people
stop using mobile
phones
. In conclusion, the causes of using mobile
phones
could be exaggerating in social media and the lack of awareness between
people
.
Therefore
,the government and the
people
should work together to reduce
this
issue.
Submitted by 13570581 on

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task achievement
Provide more specific examples or data to support your argument, as this will strengthen your points.
coherence cohesion
Try to avoid minor grammatical mistakes to enhance clarity and readability.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a solid structure with a clear introduction and conclusion.
task achievement
You have successfully identified key problems and proposed logical solutions.

Your opinion

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Preoccupied
  • Immediate surroundings
  • Potential hazards
  • Oncoming traffic
  • Uneven pavement
  • Collisions
  • Social interactions
  • Sense of community
  • Mental health
  • Over-reliance
  • Legislation
  • Awareness campaigns
  • Restrict
  • Distraction
  • Mindful walking
  • Infrastructural changes
  • Pedestrian lanes
  • Enhanced safety
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