the use of phones tablets and other devices while walking in public places has been a concern for many commentstors what hazards can arise if people are guided by such devices when walking down the street how could these problems can be solved
The
use
of mobile phones
has increased these days. People
not only use
it in their homes, but also
they use
it while
walking in public places which may cause a lot of problems.This
essay will discuss the main causes of this
phenomenon and provide a logical solution. I believe that the reasons are the lack of awareness and the excessive use
of devices
.
One of the first problems of using phones
in public places is When individuals are preoccupied with their devices
, they often fail to notice potential hazards, such
as oncoming traffic, uneven pavement, or obstacles in their path.Another problem that needs to be considered is that excessive use
of devices
in public can lead to a decrease in social interactions and a sense of community, as people
become more absorbed in their digital worlds.For example
, the result of conducted research at Glasgow University illustrates that 77% of individuals use
their mobile phones
in public places. Thus
, they can't avoid using phones
outside.
In my opinion, I think that a possible solution to this
problem would be if the governments could introduce laws to restrict the use
of electronic devices
while
walking in certain areas, and launch public awareness campaigns to educate people
on the dangers.For instance
, China plays a strong role in this
problem which leads to reduce the use
of phones
.Furthermore
, cities can implement infrastructural changes like dedicated pedestrian lanes, improved signage, and better lighting to enhance pedestrian safety and minimize distractions.Therefore
, this
may make people
stop using mobile phones
.
In conclusion, the causes of using mobile phones
could be exaggerating in social media and the lack of awareness between people
. Therefore
,the government and the people
should work together to reduce this
issue.Submitted by 13570581 on
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task achievement
Provide more specific examples or data to support your argument, as this will strengthen your points.
coherence cohesion
Try to avoid minor grammatical mistakes to enhance clarity and readability.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a solid structure with a clear introduction and conclusion.
task achievement
You have successfully identified key problems and proposed logical solutions.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?
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