Some scientists think that there are intelligent life forms on other planets and messages should be sent to contact them. Other scientists think it is a bad idea and would be dangerous. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
There is a heated debate between scientists, some of them remark that it might be a good idea to communicate with extraterrestrial beings on other planets.
On the contrary
, others mentioned that it must have deadly risks for human beings. I strongly agree with the latter opinion.
On one hand, communicating with other intelligent forms of life could benefit us through
finding new resources for our industries. As our natural resources on the earth have almost been depleted Change preposition
by
this
could be a new way for humans to expand their life into other planets. Furthermore
, it might be possible that they can help us to develop in technologies as well,
because it is probable for them to have developed in some area that we are not yet. Regarding that, we can exchange our progress with each other and make a greater civilization.
Remove the comma
apply
On the other hand
, they can be far richer than us in the military section and have undefeatable weapons. It could result in the end of human life on our planet. Also
, they could have their own domestic diseases and viruses which can affect human health as well, like the covid-19
era, a new unknown virus Correct your spelling
COVID-19
can
threaten people’s lives. In my Correct pronoun usage
that can
opinion
our planet has already so many opportunities that we could use to develop our civilization and because of that it is not a reasonable risk to put our whole species in danger of extinction by contacting strangers.
In conclusion, some researchers think that we should contact others in the cosmos to have more resources and create a massive civilization together, Add a comma
opinion,
Although
others insist on staying on the earth as this
approach can put our lives in danger by risk
of war or new sicknesses and I completely align with the idea of remaining on the earth.Add an article
the risk
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task achievement
Your introduction is clear and presents both sides of the argument effectively. However, you might want to elaborate more on the reasons why some scientists believe contacting extraterrestrial beings could be beneficial.
task achievement
In the body paragraphs, you have presented your points well. However, ensure that each paragraph fully supports your main argument and try to expand on the explanations. For example, you could provide a specific example of a technology that might be beneficial if exchanged with extraterrestrial beings.
coherence cohesion
You have a logical structure to your essay, with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. To improve, consider using more linking words and phrases to enhance the flow between paragraphs and ideas.
coherence cohesion
Try to balance the arguments for and against more evenly. This will show that you have considered both sides in a balanced manner before drawing your conclusion.
introduction conclusion present
You have a strong introduction and conclusion, which clearly state your position.
logical structure
Your essay is well-organized, and your points are presented in a logical order.
supported main points
You provided relevant examples and explanations to support your ideas, which strengthens your argument.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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