Some people get into debt by buying things they don’t need and can't afford. What are the reasons of this behavior? What actions can be taken to prevent people from having this problem?
There are some people who are not sure
for
the things that they have bought and they have to pay for their more important needs; Change preposition
about
however
, there are some causes and solutions for these activities.
Emotional inteligence
is the most important thing for managing Correct your spelling
intelligence
humen behavours
. Correct your spelling
human behaviour
Shoping
Correct your spelling
Shopping
it
is one of the most Correct pronoun usage
apply
papular
Correct your spelling
popular
interteinments
that people do Correct your spelling
entertainments
entertainment
it
because of Correct pronoun usage
apply
emotions
that they have when Correct article usage
the emotions
we
are buying. We buy Correct pronoun usage
they
somethings
even Correct your spelling
some things
we
do not need them for Correct word choice
though we
controlling
that we have not in our Replace the word
control
exiting
mind that Correct your spelling
existing
related
to our emotional Add a missing verb
is related
inteligence
, just Correct your spelling
intelligence
for
this
reason that make
us happy. Another deal for buying unuseful objects Change the verb form
makes
it
is not having Correct pronoun usage
apply
program
for our costs, if we know Add an article
a program
that
what Correct word choice
apply
are
priorities for our current situation, We Correct pronoun usage
our are
knew
that the thing that we buy Wrong verb form
know
it
is not necessary. So Correct pronoun usage
apply
do
not Unnecessary verb
apply
Knowing
how Change the verb form
Know
manage
our emotions and Add the particle
to manage
do
not Unnecessary verb
apply
having
a plan for paying Change the verb form
have
at
our priorities that are causes Change preposition
to
Correct pronoun usage
us for
for buying
in the wrong way.
Having a plan or a Change preposition
to buy
list
for every time that we are going to go shoping
can help us to buy things which we need and Correct your spelling
shopping
there
are necessary for us to have them. Writing our needs Correct pronoun usage
that
in
our mobile phone Change preposition
on
check
Wrong verb form
checking
list
excatly
the time when we Correct your spelling
exactly
realised
have to buy something, and Wrong verb form
realise
go for
Wrong verb form
going
shoping
only Correct your spelling
shopping
on
one day Change preposition
apply
in
a week can manage our wrong decisions. Change preposition
apply
Second
solution is asking Add an article
The second
A second
ourself
Correct pronoun usage
ourselves
at
Change preposition
on
shoping
day, when the time we decide Correct your spelling
shopping
buy
a thing that we are not sure is correct to do Add the particle
to buy
it
we have to ask Correct pronoun usage
apply
ourselfe
is it the thing that we can not Correct your spelling
ourselves
yourself
countinue
our life without thatCorrect your spelling
continue
?
it is Change the punctuation
.
realy
helpful for not Correct your spelling
really
shoping
Correct your spelling
shopping
products
that are not our needs. So having a Change preposition
for products
check
Correct your spelling
checklist
list
and asking ourselves are two of
Change preposition
apply
simple
Correct article usage
the simple
way
Fix the agreement mistake
ways
for
managing our Change preposition
of
shoping
Correct your spelling
shopping
behaves
.
In conclusion, Replace the word
behaviour
for having
a satisfied Change preposition
to have
soping
we need Correct your spelling
shopping
manage
our mind and emotions with some simple things like Fix the infinitive
to manage
Add an article
a check
check
Replace the word
checking
list
for shoping
and grading our needs by asking of Correct your spelling
shopping
ourselfe
.Correct your spelling
ourselves
yourself
ourself
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task achievement
You have addressed the prompt and discussed both reasons and solutions, which is good. However, the ideas presented need more development and depth to fully explain the reasons and solutions.
coherence cohesion
Your essay would benefit from clearer topic sentences and more organized paragraphs. Each paragraph should focus on a single main idea, supported by relevant examples and details.
language accuracy
There are several grammatical and spelling errors. Consider proofreading your work or using tools like spell check to correct these mistakes. Also, try to use more varied and complex sentence structures to improve readability.
task achievement
Your approach to discussing the reasons and solutions is commendable, and it's clear that you've thought about the topic.
coherence cohesion
You have included both an introduction and a conclusion in your essay, helping to frame your arguments.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.