IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Tourism is encouraged in many countries. Does tourism bring more advantages or disadvantages to a country?

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Many
countries
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 are encouraging
tourists
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 to visit their
countries
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.
Although
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 an increase in tourist numbers could pollute the
country
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, I believe that
tourism
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 can improve the economic state of a nation and
also
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 spread knowledge about the
country
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 to the rest of the world. On the one hand,
tourism
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 can lead to pollution of the areas that they cluster in groups. Since many
countries
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 do not have strong policies against
tourists
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, many of them take it for granted and litter the surroundings without
a
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apply
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concern.
For example
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, a beach
in
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on
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 the eastern side of Sri Lanka lost its pristine beauty after being dirtied by foreign travellers.
However
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,
this
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 is a fixable problem; the government can impose sanitary laws or do regular
cleans
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cleaning
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.
On the other hand
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,
economy
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the economy
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 of nations flourishes because of the increase in
number
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a number
the number
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 of
tourists
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.
That is
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 to say that people spend a lot of money in the
country
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 and fuel the economy. Many
countries
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 like Dubai and Sri Lanka are heavily dependent on foreign visitors, because of the influx of the money they bring to the
country
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.
In addition
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,
tourism
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 promotes the values of the
country
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 to the whole world. When foreign dwellers go to a
country
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 they not only perform leisure activities but
also
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 experience the culture the nation has to provide. They post pictures and share experiences of the local culture
to
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with
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 their family and friends. In conclusion, the disadvantage of
tourists
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 polluting the
country
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 is outweighed by the increase in financial support
tourism
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 brings and the fact that it educates other
countries
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 about its national attributes.

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task achievement
You have provided a clear and comprehensive response that addresses the prompt effectively. However, try to expand a bit more on the disadvantages to make the discussion more balanced.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph fully develops its idea; for instance, provide a little more insight into how the economy benefits from tourism.
introduction conclusion present
Your introduction and conclusion are clear and effectively frame your essay, which makes your main points easy to follow.
supported main points
The main points in your essay are well-supported with relevant specific examples, such as the example of the beach in Sri Lanka.
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