With the increased global demand in oil and gas, undiscovered area of the world should be opened up to access more resourced. To what extent do you agree?

Petroluim
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Petroleum
and natural gas fields are very
fital
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vital
for all countries in the world,
however
, nowadays high demands
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
them are exceeding the limitation
beacuse
Correct your spelling
because
the consumption of fossil
fuel
Fix the agreement mistake
fuels
show examples
are getting
more
Correct quantifier usage
apply
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and cannot decide easily to reduce the production of
hydrocabons
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hydrocarbons
and other materials.
Moreover
, In my opinion, I disagree with
this
statement
beacuse
Correct your spelling
because
the extraction of new fields
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
unsuifficent
Correct your spelling
insufficient
and it will blind our eyes from focusing
to
Change preposition
on
show examples
new resources like alternative energies which are clean energy and
didn't
Wrong verb form
don't
show examples
harm the environment and cause
pollutions
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pollution
show examples
to the atmosphere. The first
evidance
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evidence
, the cleanest sources which consider as alternative
soultions
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solutions
of
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to
show examples
oil and gas fields are widely
avaliable
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available
such
as
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
solar, wind and nuclear sources which can be used in many applications.
For example
, many countries commerce to utilize solar energy to produce electricity, especially in
Add an article
the middle
show examples
middle east
Correct your spelling
Middle East
show examples
due to
the sunlight radiation in those countries
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
very huge and
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task achievement
You have presented a clear stance on the topic and provided some reasons to support your viewpoint. However, your essay lacks sufficient development and elaboration of ideas. Consider adding more detailed examples and explanations.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has an introduction, but it's missing a clear conclusion. Make sure to include a concluding paragraph that summarizes your main points and underscores your stance.
coherence cohesion
The logical structure of the essay needs improvement. Consider organizing your essay into clear paragraphs, each with a single main idea that supports your argument. This will make your essay easier to follow.
supported main points
Some of your points lack supporting evidence. Try to provide more specific examples or statistics to strengthen your arguments.
task achievement
You have addressed the task prompt and stated your position clearly.
supported main points
You have identified alternative sources of energy and provided a relevant example of solar energy use in the Middle East.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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