WRITING TASK 2 You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. Write about the following topic: In many families nowadays, both parents work and pay people to look after their children. Some people believe this is not good for families. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. Write at least 250 words.
In the present, many
families
have both parents
working and, as a result
, they may not have enough time
to take care of their children
. Consequently
, they often hire people to look after their children
. Some people believe this
is not suitable for families
. However
, from my point of view, I completely disagree with this
for two reasons: the lack of correlation between the amount of time
spent looking after children
and the quality of family life, and the fact that professional babysitters can care for children
more efficiently than inexperienced parents
.
First of all, there is no direct correlation between good family relationships and the amount of free time
parents
spend with their children
. What is more important is the quality of time
and the love parents
provide. For example
, in my experience, my mother and father didn’t have much time
to play with me when I was young because they had their own business to run during the day. During that time
, I stayed with a homemaker. However
, every night, my parents
had dinner with me and gave me a warm hug. I shared the fascinating school moments with my mom and dad, which made me feel loved and supported.
Secondly
, experienced babysitters help new mothers and fathers look after their children
effectively. For instance
, new parents
may not know how to handle a crying baby, whereas
professional caregivers know how to manage such
situations. Moreover
, most babysitters have the knowledge and skills to enhance a child’s emotional well-being, which can contribute positively to their development.
To summarize, I disagree with the statement that hiring people to look after children
is not good for families
. There are many factors, such
as love and professional care, that contribute to the well-being of a family. Therefore
, perfect families
should provide the crucial elements necessary for the quality growth of their children
.Submitted by noser074 on
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introduction conclusion
Your introduction and conclusion are clear and well-articulated. To further strengthen your conclusion, you could summarize the main arguments more explicitly.
logical structure
Ensure each paragraph has a clear central idea and that these ideas are linked explicitly between paragraphs; this strengthens the logical flow. Hence, consider using more transitional phrases between your points and paragraphs.
relevant specific examples
Excellent use of specific examples from personal experience, which make your arguments convincing and relatable.
clear comprehensive ideas
Your essay demonstrated clear and comprehensive ideas throughout, making it easy to follow.
Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.
‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.
Examples:
I really want to study but I’m too tired.
I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.
If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.
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