Some people believe that the government is wasting money on the arts and that this money should be invested better in other areas. To what extent do you agree with this view?

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In today's world, the debate surrounding arts has become the central topic of public discourse. Some strongly support the idea that the government should invest
money
in areas other than arts, a notion I find myself inclined to agree with. In support of
this
perspective, my agreement is primarily shaped by its logical coherence that investing
money
in public facilities yields more
benefits
. A significant study from Hong Kong University confirmed that Norway, as the happiest country in the world, demonstrates a profound and consistent interconnection with its construction of infrastructure,
further
reinforcing
this
view. It is
also
important to consider that spending
money
on building disability facilities will result in more practical
benefits
, largely because .
Therefore
, there are numerous compelling arguments in
favor
Change the spelling
favour
show examples
of
this
viewpoint.
Moreover
, investing in technology brings
benefits
, including modern technology's positive effects on students' academic performance. These positive outcomes come from the improvement of student's understanding. In practice, many communities have seen improvements in the belief that students gain a better understanding of course content by learning with the aid of technology.
Thus
,the
benefical
Correct your spelling
beneficial
impacts are big and clear. In conclusion, my belief is that the
benefits
of investing in other areas far outweigh any potential merit in spending
money
on the arts, based on the strong arguments outlined.
This
belief is supported by a thorough look at the
benefits
, which clearly show the positive nature of putting
money
in other areas.
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coherence cohesion
Work on enhancing paragraph transitions to improve the flow of ideas between paragraphs.
coherence cohesion
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introduction conclusion present
The introduction and conclusion are well-presented, clearly framing the discussion and summarizing the viewpoints effectively.
logical structure
The structure of the essay is logical, which helps in clearly communicating the main arguments.
clear comprehensive ideas
The essay demonstrates a reasonable range of vocabulary and proper grammatical structures.

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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