Parents should spend their time with their children helping them with their homework. Do you agree or disagree?
It is
a
paramount for Change the article
apply
parents
to dedicate a lot of their time in
assisting their children as they do their homework. Change preposition
to
This
essay will illustrate that I am in total agreement with this
statement because this
will motivate children to put more effort in
what they do as they see their Change preposition
into
parents
putting interest in their studies and it will bring parents
and their kids closer.
Firstly
, youngsters are greatly encouraged to pursue their studies with passion if they have their mother and father supporting them especially
with their Add the comma(s)
, especially
school-work
. Correct your spelling
schoolwork
This
will greatly encourage them to excel in their studies as many little ones always want to please their mum and dad. For example
, a child
who is assisted by their mother or father in most cases, tends to have higher grades as compared to one who does their educational work alone. The one who is assisted will always want to make their mum and dad happy.
Secondly
, there is creation
of a great bond that cannot be broken for students who do their learning tasks with the assistance of their mummy and daddy. There is an element of them coming closer and closer together. When the Add an article
the creation
a creation
child
forgets about something, they will remember their mother’s voice or joke and that will motivate them and also
put a smile on their face. This
also
helps the parents
notice if a child
has any problems. Nowadays, there is bullying in schools, so if a child
encounters such
things, when the mother or father is close to them, they will notice that something is wrong with their child
and will quickly ask her and deal with the problem.
In conclusion, it is necessary for parents
to spend their time assisting their children with their school things as it will benefit both the child
and the parents
and their bond will not be easily destroyed.Submitted by pncubeterera on
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task achievement
Your introduction is clear and sets up the essay well, but you can improve it by making the thesis statement more precise. For instance, rather than saying 'This essay will illustrate that I am in total agreement with this statement,' you could say 'I agree because this will motivate children to put more effort into their studies and will strengthen the parent-child bond.'
task achievement
While your supporting points are strong, there is a slight repetitiveness in the arguments. Try to introduce a third distinct reason or provide more depth to the existing ones to make your essay more comprehensive.
coherence cohesion
The essay is generally well-structured, but ensure smoother transitions between sentences and paragraphs to enhance coherence. For example, using linking phrases like 'Moreover,' or 'In addition,' can help to make the ideas flow more naturally.
coherence cohesion
The conclusion is quite effective in summarizing the main points, but you could make it more impactful by reiterating the key reasons that parents should help with homework, rather than just stating it generally.
coherence cohesion
Your essay is well-organized with a clear beginning, middle, and end. The introduction and conclusion are both present and effectively frame your argument.
task achievement
You have clearly expressed your ideas and supported them with relevant examples. The connection between parental involvement and the child's motivation and academic performance is well made.
task achievement
The points about the enhanced bond between parents and children and the ability of parents to notice issues like bullying show a deep understanding of the topic.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.
Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.
When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.
Linking words for giving examples:
- for example
- for instance
- to illustrate this
- to give a clear example
- such as
- namely
- to illustrate
- take, for example