Around the world, rural people are moving to cities and urban areas, so populations in the countryside are decreasing. Is this a positive or negative development?

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Nowadays more and more rural people worldwide leave villages and move to big cities. Many individuals think it is not positive if lots of villagers migrate to urban cities. In

this

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essay, I will discuss the negative side of

this

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trend by providing examples of its impact on agriculture and organic produce.

According to

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the latest news, there has been a decline in agricultural production. One of the factors could be the migration of people from the countryside to urban areas.

This

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trend created a reduction in agricultural labor which led to a worsening in the quality of natural

products

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For example

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due to

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the robotisation practice, there was a recent increase in the unemployment rate in rural areas of Kazakhstan.

As a result

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, thousands of customers recently showed their complaints regarding new milk

products

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such

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as cheese , milk , cottage cheese, and sour cream. In the

last

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50 years, plenty of factories and farms have manufactured their output

products

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in a more unnatural and unhealthy way for humans. One of the examples could be the scandal about the company Nestle which used harmful chemicals to boost their profit and

such

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behavior is very common among big businesses. To illustrate, many have noticed that cow or pig

meat

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is not as tasty as before. Recent studies revealed that it is because factories raised animals with pills and special injections for fast growth.

This

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practice resulted in many diseases both for farm animals and humans.

Moreover

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, many complained that

this

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also

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ruined the taste of

meat

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, and its quality and resulted in the decline in

meat

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sales nationwide. In conclusion, the migration of rural people to urban places has a deep impact not only on agriculture but

also

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on public health. In my opinion,

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has more negative effects on society than positive as illustrated by examples of the production of milk

products

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and the recent degradation of the quality of

meat

Use synonyms

sa_artekMon Jun 17 2024

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task response

Make sure to clearly define your stance in the introduction. Begin by explicitly stating whether you believe the trend is positive or negative before delving into the specifics.

task response

In the second paragraph, the point about agricultural decline due to migration could be made more explicit and directly tied to the argument about the negative impact on agriculture.

coherence and cohesion

While the essay flows well, consider using more varied linking words and phrases to enhance cohesion. This will make the argumentation smoother, e.g., 'In addition,' 'Furthermore,' etc.

coherence and cohesion

The essay has a solid structure, but to elevate it further, you might consider adding a counter-argument briefly and then refuting it, which can strengthen your position.

task response

Clarify your examples and connect them directly to the main point you are making in each paragraph. Make sure each example illustrates a specific negative consequence of rural-urban migration as clearly as possible.

task response

The essay provides relevant specific examples, making the argument strong and relatable.

coherence and cohesion

The main points are clearly supported with evidence and reasoning, showing a thorough understanding of the topic.

coherence and cohesion

The logical structure of the essay is well-organized, with each paragraph focusing on a specific aspect of the argument.

9
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

322 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Urbanization
Amenities
Economic prospects
Overcrowding
Traffic congestion
Pollution
Agricultural abandonment
Cultural diversity
Innovation
Cultural heritage
Family ties
Infrastructure
Public services
Sustainable urban planning
Rural revitalization

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Around the world, rural people are moving to cities and urban areas, so populations in the countryside are decreasing. Is this a positive or negative development?

In most of the socities,the role of mother and father differs.what are the causes of this differences? What will be the parental role in future?

Write a letter to the information officer at the tape information office asking for information about the tertiary preparation certificate. Describe your education background and your reason for wanting to do the course

The best way to teach children to cooperate is through team sports at school. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend lage sums of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains between cities. Others believe the money should be spent on improving existing public transport. Discuss both these views and giver your own opinion