Creative artists should always be given freedom to express their own ideas (in words, pictures, music or film) in whichever way they wish. There should be no government restrictions on what they do. To what extent do you agree or disagree on this IELTS topic?
Freedom to express
ideas
were
needed for creative Correct subject-verb agreement
was
artists
but sometimes, the government
gives restrictions
for expressing creative ideas
. Hence
in this
essay, I will discuss why the government
should give restrictions
for creative artists
to express their ideas
.
The demerits
of giving Fix the agreement mistake
demerit
restrictions
for creative artists
to express their ideas
is the level of difficulty to produce
Change preposition
in producing
an
Remove the article
apply
art
is increasing. These restrictions
give
a lot of pressure Verb problem
put
to
the creative communities to work on their Change preposition
on
ideas
, making them unable to work freely and more boring. Therefore
, the art
that they produced became less enjoyable and did not have uniqueness. This
is very unfortunate because art
is something that should be unique and depict the expression that comes from each artist making it more valuable for society. Beside
that, the Replace the word
Besides
economical
value of Replace the word
economic
art
has become more undesirable for art
collectors around the world, this
situation increases the difficulty of preserving art
collection
.
Creative Fix the agreement mistake
collections
artists
commonly express their ideas
out of the box, they can make a huge graffiti on the national building or make a controversial film that is
against the government
. This
situation happened because they wanted to create a spotlight and acknowledgement from creative fellows, but there will be dissent and polemic which can incite public anger. Therefore
the government
must create restrictions
to prevent this
chaos happening
in their country.
In conclusion, the Change preposition
from happening
government
must create a clear and reasonable restriction for creative artists
to express their ideas
in the
society so they can express their Correct article usage
apply
ideas
without harming the
society.Correct article usage
apply
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task achievement
The essay would benefit from clearly stating the main argument in the introduction. It currently provides a background but not a strong thesis statement. A clearer thesis helps set the direction for the essay.
task achievement
Try to incorporate more specific examples that illustrate your points. For instance, you could mention specific instances where artistic freedom has led to societal issues or where government restrictions have stifled creativity.
coherence cohesion
Ensure smooth and logical progression between paragraphs. Use transitional phrases to guide the reader and enhance the coherence of your argument.
coherence cohesion
The conclusion should summarize the main points of the essay more comprehensively. Restate the thesis in a clearer manner and briefly recap the arguments made.
task achievement
The essay touches upon important aspects of the issue, such as the balance between artistic freedom and societal order.
coherence cohesion
The main points are logically arranged, facilitating the reader's understanding of the arguments being made.
task achievement
The essay discusses both the negative impacts of government restrictions and the potential need for them, which provides a balanced perspective.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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