In the past, teachers were the main source of information, but today students have a wide source of information, so teachers are no longer important in the modern education. Do you agree or disagree?

Many people assert that
students
have access
a
Change preposition
to a
show examples
wider range of
information
nowadays, which reduces the responsibility of
teachers
in
academic
Fix the agreement mistake
academics
show examples
.
However
, there is a persuasive argument that
teachers
still play a significant role in the academic environment. In the modern society, the
students
have become independent learners who use the Internet to satisfy their curiosity.
However
,
due to
the
information
came
Correct pronoun usage
that came
show examples
from the Internet
can
Correct pronoun usage
that can
show examples
give the wrong data,
teachers
should check the
fact
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facts
show examples
for
students
before the wrong data
fixed
Wrong verb form
fixes
show examples
their
brain
Fix the agreement mistake
brains
show examples
.
Moreover
,
teachers
can provide valuable guidance on enhancing study skills, which they have gained through professional training and experience.
For example
, in Korea, personal tutors remain popular, with parents willing to pay a premium to hire personal tutors for each subject for their children.
On the other hand
, even though
computers
can perform many school-related tasks,
teachers
are still necessary because they provide
students
with more than just
information
. Even though
computers
can provide
information
,
teachers
are needed to explain
this
information
to
students
. Most importantly, it is a teacher’s job to show
students
how to apply
information
to particular situations in a useful way. In fact,
computers
provide too much
information
, so
students
might become confused since it is hard to organize
information
without a teacher.
This
show
Change the verb form
shows
show examples
that
computers
make the role of
teachers
become more important. In conclusion,
although
many
students
have access to a vast amount of
information
,
this
does not diminish the importance of
teachers
. The benefits of fact-checking and the proper using skills strongly support the continued significance of
teachers
. For all these reasons, I believe that
teachers
remain the main source of academic guidance.
Submitted by kopopig on

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coherence cohesion
Your essay could benefit from a clearer logical structure. The points you make are valid, but they could be presented in a more organized manner to help the reader better follow your argument. Consider using more transitional phrases and ensuring each paragraph focuses on a single main idea.
task achievement
While your ideas are clear and your response is complete, adding more specific examples to support your points would enhance your argument. Specific examples can make your argument more convincing and concrete.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion are both strong and clearly present the main argument of the essay. This helps set a clear framework for your discussion.
task achievement
You have effectively covered all aspects of the task and provided a complete response to the prompt, demonstrating a solid understanding of the topic.
task achievement
Your ideas are clear and easy to understand, which makes your essay very readable. Clarity is crucial for effective communication in writing.

Your opinion

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