Many young people leave school with a negative attitude towards education. What are the reasons for this? How can we encourage young people to study harder?

#people #school #attitude #education #study

Teenagers believe

theories

they learn at school do not have a significant impact on their lives. The reason behind

that is

they think that

theories

are not crucial enough to care about. To overcome the problem, schools must incorporate both academics and implement those in their curriculums. Societies doctrine the youngster that

theories

themself are not sufficient enough to get their work done efficiently.

Consequently

, from the

students

’ perspective, they saw the

theory

as not crucial for their studies or the future.

Nevertheless

, some adults argue whether they are the cause of the issue as they think the teacher themself plant that doctrine in their

students

Although

this

may be true, experts suggest that 75 companies worldwide tell their workers to implement the

theory

more rather than make it strong

first

As a consequence

, the exercise was more highlighted than the

theory

. Given these points, people,

as well as

they saw

theory

as a side skill to learn, rather than being the most important aspect to learn

first

. It may seem that the exercise was the issue but it is as crucial as academic’

theory

Thus

, utilizing them both will bring more benefits to the student.

Nonetheless

, there is a mixed opinion where some people see academics as more crucial than implementing it and others see they could learn as they walk.

On the other hand

, the scientist states that mastering the basic

first

, which is the

theory

, will make them do their jobs efficiently and increase their productivity.

In addition

, they state that

students

who master the basics will boost their productivity by 20% above the average.

For

this

reason, School needs to teach their student to master academics

first

to make

students

think that

theories

are important.

Overall

, the reason why the

students

do not positively see

theories

is because teenagers see

theory

as trivial, and implementing it seems more beneficial for them.

Additionally

, as a solution, making a curriculum for incorporates them at the same time could be one of the solutions to solve the issue.

Submitted by arsyiiimuhammad061 on Tue Jun 18 2024

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task achievement

While you've addressed the question, your response can be more thorough. Try to more clearly outline the reasons why young people develop negative attitudes towards education and provide specific, actionable solutions to encourage them to study harder.

coherence cohesion

Work on strengthening the logical flow of your essay. Ensure that each paragraph transitions smoothly to the next and that your arguments follow a clear, logical order.

coherence cohesion

Your main points are somewhat supported, but they could be more developed with specific examples or evidence. Adding real-world scenarios or studies can help illustrate your points more effectively.

introduction conclusion present

Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps frame your argument.

task achievement

You have shown an understanding of both the issue and potential solutions, which demonstrates a good grasp of the topic.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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15Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

339 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Many young people leave school with a negative attitude towards education. What are the reasons for this? How can we encourage young people to study harder?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Fast food is becoming part of life everywhere. This phenomenon affects people’s lifestyle and diet.Do you agree or disagree?

Some people think that environmental problems should be solved on a global scale while others believe it is better to deal with them nationally. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

Your neighbor keeps his/her animal in the garden. Write to him/her about it and the inconvenience it causes you and your family. In your letter · tell what the problem is · explain why it causes inconvenience · suggest a possible solution to it

In many countries governments are investing in new technology to deal with the public. Why this is happening? Do you think this is an appropriate use of government money?

Convenience foods will become increasingly prevalent (widespread) and eventually replace traditional foods and methods of preparation. To what extent do you agree or disagree