Many young people leave school with a negative attitude towards education. What are the reasons for this? How can we encourage young people to study harder?

#people #school #attitude #education #study

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Teenagers believe

theories

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they learn at school do not have a significant impact on their lives. The reason behind

that is

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they think that

theories

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are not crucial enough to care about. To overcome the problem, schools must incorporate both academics and implement those in their curriculums. Societies doctrine the youngster that

theories

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themself are not sufficient enough to get their work done efficiently.

Consequently

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, from the

students

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’ perspective, they saw the

theory

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as not crucial for their studies or the future.

Nevertheless

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, some adults argue whether they are the cause of the issue as they think the teacher themself plant that doctrine in their

students

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Although

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this

Linking Words

may be true, experts suggest that 75 companies worldwide tell their workers to implement the

theory

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more rather than make it strong

first

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As a consequence

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, the exercise was more highlighted than the

theory

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. Given these points, people,

as well as

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they saw

theory

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as a side skill to learn, rather than being the most important aspect to learn

first

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. It may seem that the exercise was the issue but it is as crucial as academic’

theory

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Thus

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, utilizing them both will bring more benefits to the student.

Nonetheless

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, there is a mixed opinion where some people see academics as more crucial than implementing it and others see they could learn as they walk.

On the other hand

Linking Words

, the scientist states that mastering the basic

Linking Words

first

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, which is the

theory

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, will make them do their jobs efficiently and increase their productivity.

In addition

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, they state that

students

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who master the basics will boost their productivity by 20% above the average.

For

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this

Linking Words

reason, School needs to teach their student to master academics

first

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to make

students

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think that

theories

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are important.

Overall

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, the reason why the

students

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do not positively see

theories

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is because teenagers see

theory

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as trivial, and implementing it seems more beneficial for them.

Additionally

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, as a solution, making a curriculum for incorporates them at the same time could be one of the solutions to solve the issue.

Submitted by arsyiiimuhammad061 on Tue Jun 18 2024

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task achievement

While you've addressed the question, your response can be more thorough. Try to more clearly outline the reasons why young people develop negative attitudes towards education and provide specific, actionable solutions to encourage them to study harder.

coherence cohesion

Work on strengthening the logical flow of your essay. Ensure that each paragraph transitions smoothly to the next and that your arguments follow a clear, logical order.

coherence cohesion

Your main points are somewhat supported, but they could be more developed with specific examples or evidence. Adding real-world scenarios or studies can help illustrate your points more effectively.

introduction conclusion present

Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps frame your argument.

task achievement

You have shown an understanding of both the issue and potential solutions, which demonstrates a good grasp of the topic.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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15
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

339 words

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Many young people leave school with a negative attitude towards education. What are the reasons for this? How can we encourage young people to study harder?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Many developed countries are giving financial aid to poor countries. However, this hasn’t solved the problem of poverty in these nations and so other types of help are needed. To what extent do you agree or disagree with the statement?

Writing Task 2 You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. Nowadays, more people move away from their friends and families for work. Do advantages outweigh the disadvantages? You should write at least 250 words.

The best way to plan a holiday is by not planning at all. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. You should spend about 40 minutes on this task

Some people say that school education is not useful and the essence of study can be acquired at home. Do you agree? Why or why not? Use reasons and specific examples to explain your answer.

Some people think that the government is wasting money on the arts and that this money could be better spent elsewhere. To what extent do you agree with this view?