IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4

In some places, young people find it difficult to communicate with older people. Why is this? What are the solutions?

#places #people
I think
,
Remove the comma
apply
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 They need to know about living in
this
 world
for planning
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to plan
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the
Change the word
their
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 future
of
Change preposition
apply
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them
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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. What
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
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older people
do
Wrong verb form
did
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 in the past
are
Wrong verb form
were
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 things to help young people learn
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
and develop themselves.
It's
Correct your spelling
Its
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 experience gives form older generation to
next
Correct article usage
the next
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 generation. But they don't forget
Correct article usage
the different
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different
Replace the word
differences
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 between generations,
experience
Fix the agreement mistake
experiences
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, timelines, places, cultures and communities so they should
beware
Correct your spelling
be aware
show examples
about
Change preposition
of
show examples
 talking together
form
Correct your spelling
from
show examples
 different comments.
Submitted by kanchanakularathna1991 on

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task achievement
Try to explain why young people find it difficult to communicate with older people. Suggest specific reasons like the generation gap, technology, differences in values, etc.
task achievement
Use specific examples to support your points, such as instances of miscommunication or misunderstandings.
coherence cohesion
Organize your essay with clear paragraphs: an introduction, body, and conclusion.
coherence cohesion
Expand on each idea to make your argument stronger. Each paragraph should have one main idea supported by examples or explanations.
task achievement
You’ve recognized the importance of intergenerational communication and the value of shared experiences.
coherence cohesion
Your essay shows an awareness of the differences in generations, experiences, and cultures.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • technological proficiency
  • communication gap
  • digital tools
  • worldviews
  • common ground
  • contemporary slang
  • informal language
  • misunderstandings
  • social hierarchy
  • cultural norms
  • stereotypes
  • prejudices
  • open communication
  • out of touch
  • inexperienced
  • effective communication
  • intergenerational programs
  • cross-generational activities
  • mutual respect
  • active listening
What to do next:
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