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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Exercise 1 - Task One Pineapple exports The charts show world pineapple exports by the top three pineapple-producing countries in 2009 and 2019, and a breakdown of the cost to the consumer of each pineapple in 2019.

Exercise 1 - Task One Pineapple exports The charts show world pineapple exports by the top three pineapple-producing countries in 2009 and 2019, and a breakdown of the cost to the consumer of each pineapple in 2019.
#exercise #pineapple #exports #show #world #three #countries #breakdown #cost #consumer
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The
given
Verb problem
apply
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bar chart indicates the world
pineapple
Use synonyms
 exports for the top three countries that produced
this
Linking Words
 fruit in 2009 and 2019, and the pie chart shows the cost of each
pineapple
Use synonyms
 for the customer.
It is clear that
Linking Words
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
country
Use synonyms
 A had the biggest production in 2019,
while
Linking Words
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
country
Use synonyms
 B had
this
Linking Words
 position in 2019. Distribution and retail included the greatest part of the cost for each
pineapple
Use synonyms
 in 2019. In 2009,
country
Use synonyms
 B harvested the biggest amount of
pineapple
Use synonyms
 more than 4 metric tonnes,
while
Linking Words
country
Use synonyms
 A had just about 1 metric tonne production, and the figures for
country
Use synonyms
 C were negligible. Meanwhile,
country
Use synonyms
 A produced a huge rate of
this
Linking Words
 fruit which was almost 10 metric tonnes,
while
Linking Words
country
Use synonyms
 B just gave about 1.5 metric tonnes of
pineapple
Use synonyms
 to the global market. The pie chart shows that 35% of the expenditure of each
pineapple
Use synonyms
 was for distribution and retail in 2019.
In addition
Linking Words
, profit and taxes had 18% and 16% of expenditure for the customer, respectively. The amount of money which the consumer expended on import licences and international transport for each
pineapple
Use synonyms
 was about 11 per cent,
while
Linking Words
 the proportions for export costs and profit was almost 4%.
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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Basic structure: Use less body paragraphs.
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Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words pineapple, country with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "give" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "shows" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "almost" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
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