IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

“What are the advantages of getting news online? What are the drawbacks

#“what #news
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There is no doubt that these days online
news
 is one of the most important ways of finding out about the world. But what are the benefits of
this
 situation and what are the drawbacks? In
this
 essay, I am going to look at both sides and try to draw some conclusions.
To begin
 with the pros, online
news
 has developed in the
last
 ten years, with reports and interviews.
In addition
, it can help people who want to read the latest
news
 every hour to be aware of the
news
.
For example
, I am used to reading the
news
 every day on X or Aljazera about
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
sports and economics. Turning to the other side of the argument, there are plenty of channels which show fake
news
.
Furthermore
, some channels advertise themselves as trustworthy, but in
reality
Add a comma
reality,
show examples
 are not.
However
, they might be fake channels, stealing people’s information when they click on their
link
Fix the agreement mistake
links
show examples
. In conclusion, I believe that the pros outweigh the cons,
although
 users should be careful about what they read, as online
news
 makes life easier than it used to be. لها قائمة سياق
Submitted by yosf1010 on

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task achievement
Your essay has a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. However, try to provide more detailed and specific examples to support your points. This will improve the depth of your argument.
coherence cohesion
The logical sequence of ideas is mostly clear, but some sentences and paragraphs could be connected more smoothly. Using more transitional phrases can help improve the flow of your essay.
task achievement
Ensure to discuss both advantages and drawbacks in more detail. The essay could benefit from a more balanced consideration of both sides to thoroughly address the prompt.
introduction conclusion present
The introduction clearly states the topic and sets up the discussion effectively.
introduction conclusion present
The conclusion succinctly summarizes your viewpoint and provides a clear closing to your essay.
task achievement
Your essay demonstrates a good understanding of the topic and provides a clear argument in favor of online news, with acknowledgment of potential drawbacks.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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