Living in a country where you have to speak a foreighn language can cause serious social problems, as well as practical problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Moving abroad, where our own
language
is not spoken can cause serious difficulties in order to connect to people
aronund
Correct your spelling
around
us,
at
Correct word choice
and at
show examples
the same time can make harder
devevloping
Verb problem
to develop
show examples
some daily activities. I completely agree with
thit
Correct your spelling
that
this
statement, and I will share my complete opinion in the next paragraphs. Nowadays our world is getting smaller
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
because every time is easy to move from one place to another, it has a
lot
of advantages,
for
example
Add a comma
example,
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we get to know more cultures, more people, we are able to appreciate the value that we can find in the differences surrounding us. But in order to achieve all these goals we have to pay the price.
Some times
Correct your spelling
Sometimes
show examples
it means that we need to learn a new
language
, make new friends, and develop new routines, often we do not feel comfortable taking all these challenges, and for sure is not an easy thing to do. But is paramount that we embrace it in the best way if we really want to enjoy living a life abroad. Even though for some may not be as complicated, as
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
is the case of many migrants that go to a country where the same
language
is spoken. Here in
Colombia
Add a comma
Colombia,
show examples
we have a
lot
of people from Venezuela
as
Change preposition
for
show examples
an
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
example, they moved looking for better opportunities, and we share not only the
language
but
also
a
lot
of customs. Which can make the adaptation process much easier. In conclusion, I strongly believe that in any case moving abroad requires a
lot
of courage, even if the
language
or customs are not a first concern, because anyone that
decide
Change the verb form
decides
show examples
to take
such
a challenge has to be completely sure about leaving aside all the commodities
such
are home and friends and just jump into a wild and unknown adventure.
Submitted by otiyog on

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spelling grammar
Make sure to proofread your work or use a spell checker to avoid spelling and grammar mistakes. For example, 'foreighn' should be 'foreign', 'thit' should be 'this', and 'devevloping' should be 'developing'.
introduction conclusion
Your introduction and conclusion are present, but there's room to make them stronger and more engaging. Try to introduce the topic with a bit more context and rephrase your conclusion to restate your main points more clearly.
support examples
Support your main points with more specific examples or anecdotes to make your argument more compelling. For instance, you could describe a particular daily activity that becomes challenging when living in a foreign country.
vocabulary sentence structures
Consider broadening your vocabulary and using a variety of sentence structures to make your essay more engaging and effective. For instance, vary your sentence length and grammatical structures to avoid repetition.
paragraph structure
Ensure your paragraphs are well-developed and focused on a single idea. Each paragraph should begin with a clear topic sentence that introduces the main point.
organization structure
While your main points are clear, they could be better organized for a more logical structure. Consider creating a brief outline before you start writing to ensure each point flows logically into the next.
task understanding
You have a good understanding of the topic and your argument is clear. It's apparent that you are aware of the challenges faced by people living in a foreign country.
conclusion strength
Your conclusion effectively summarizes your main points and brings the essay to a close.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

You are not ready for IELTS Speaking, if you

  • Can’t speak smoothly without pauses.
  • Use simple words and lack vocabulary.
  • Feel nervous and anxious when speaking.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Language barrier
  • Miscommunication
  • Isolation
  • Cultural differences
  • Social norms
  • Essential services
  • Employment challenges
  • Social integration
  • Community events
  • Support systems
What to do next:
Look at other essays:

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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