IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

Some people believe that educating children altogether will benefit them. Others think intelligent children should be taught separately and given special courses. Discuss those two views.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
According to
Linking Words
 some people, the
students
Use synonyms
 who are considered smart should be offered lessons separate from other children. It is assumed that those
kids
Use synonyms
 have some hidden potential as they demonstrate outstanding results compared to other ones. Training them properly by special teachers and teaching them courses designed particularly to uncover their talents would be extremely beneficial for their future careers.
In addition
Linking Words
, those special practices might be considered quite difficult to comprehend for ordinary
students
Use synonyms
, so they would have some hardships keeping up with the pace of clever ones.
However
Linking Words
, others, including me, believe that studying in groups blended with
students
Use synonyms
 of all intelligence levels would have more effective outcomes.
Firstly
Linking Words
, all children regardless of their marks and academic results have the same rights to receive the same education and opportunities offered to smart ones. There might be
kids
Use synonyms
 in each group who do not present successful results,
however
Linking Words
, possess higher IQs. It might be a problem to differentiate those
kids
Use synonyms
 from others since they need individual approaches and special treatments to encourage them.
Therefore
Linking Words
, it is not fair to leave them on their own to figure out how to be successful
students
Use synonyms
.
Secondly
Linking Words
, assembling all smart
students
Use synonyms
 in one group and
labeling
Change the spelling
labelling
show examples
 them as intelligent would demotivate the others since they might tend to think that they are already behind smart
kids
Use synonyms
 because of the factors they do not have control over.
This
Linking Words
 approach would result in undesired outcomes and increase the number of
students
Use synonyms
 who drop out of school for not being wise enough. To summarize, I have come to the conclusion that children should be taught collectively since they have a right to be treated equally and encouraged by receiving the same level of education.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

clear comprehensive ideas
The ideas presented are clear and comprehensive for the most part, but aim for greater specificity and depth in your examples.
relevant specific examples
Ensure all arguments are fully developed with relevant specific examples to strengthen your essay.
logical structure
Improve logical transitions between ideas to enhance the flow and make it easier for the reader to follow your points.
introduction conclusion present
The essay introduction and conclusion are well-presented, but the introduction could be more engaging.
complete response
The essay provides a balanced discussion of both views, demonstrating a comprehensive response to the task.
introduction conclusion present
Good structuring of the essay with a clear introduction and conclusion.

Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

The easiest way to score well on the IELTS Task 2 writing portion is to structure your writing in a solid essay format.

A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).

Stick to this essay structure:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • social integration
  • sense of equality
  • collaborate
  • different perspectives
  • tailored learning experience
  • advanced needs
  • academic performance
  • diverse learning environment
  • value different skills and abilities
  • real-world situations
  • bored or under-stimulated
  • general classroom
  • engaged in their education
  • stigmatization
  • discrimination
  • perform at the same level
  • gifted peers
  • elitism
  • foster an unhealthy competitive environment
What to do next:
Look at other essays: