Some people believe that the government should fund art and culture, while others think that it should only fund sciences. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
There is a contentious debate about the funding of
government
and whether money
should be allocated to art
and culture
or to science
. Although
art
and culture
represent the unique identity of a nation, yet science
domain is necessary for making improvements in society.
On the one hand, proponents of art
and culture
consider that the government
should finance art
and culture
as it depicts the special elements of a country. In order to maintain the interest of people in the creative field and to follow the culture
, the government
should fund this
area. For example
, had the Indian government
not spent on the historical buildings, the ancient history related to India would not have been known to many people in world
.
Add an article
the world
On the other hand
, supporters of science
claim that the government
ought to give precedence to science
by funding because it is essential for the advancements in society. To justify, making improvements in society, scientists have to conduct experiments and research which require a hefty amount of money
. Only higher authorities can aid with such
a large amount of money
. Therefore
, science
should be kept as a priority. For instance
, governments are spending hundreds of thousands on clean energy sources.
In my opinion, higher officials should release funds for both areas as these areas have insignificant value for the holistic development of a nation. This
is because if art
and culture
do not receive some part of the budget, it will disappear in the future. Similarly
, in case of a lack of money
in the science
domain, progress in the experimentation will be hindered. Thus
, both aspects are equally important.
In conclusion, several people contend that the government
should finance art
and culture
whereas
others think that priority should be given to science
. I believe that an equal distribution of funds will be a wise approach; both areas are imperative for the overall
development of a country.Submitted by immysandhu94 on
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task achievement
Your essay effectively addresses the task and presents a balanced discussion on the topic. However, to enhance task response, consider further developing the arguments for both sides. Providing additional examples or elaborating on how science drives societal advancements could strengthen your essay.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a logical structure with an effective introduction and conclusion. While the main points are clear, some of the transitions between ideas could be smoother. Use more linking words and phrases to improve coherence and cohesion. For instance, use phrases like 'Furthermore,' 'In addition,' or 'On the contrary,' to better connect your ideas.
coherence cohesion
One way to improve your essay's coherence further is by explicitly stating the main points at the beginning of each paragraph. This can help guide the reader through your arguments more smoothly. For example, starting a paragraph with 'Another important aspect to consider is...' can set a clear direction for the reader.
coherence cohesion
You provided a clear introduction that sets the stage for your discussion and a concise conclusion that summarizes your points. This helps create a well-rounded essay.
task achievement
You offered relevant examples to support your points, which is crucial in demonstrating the practical implications of your arguments. For example, referencing the Indian government’s spending on historical buildings added depth to your discussion.
clear comprehensive ideas
Your essay maintains a clear and formal tone throughout, which is appropriate for an IELTS task. This helps in conveying your ideas effectively and professionally.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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