Rich countries often give money to poorer countries, but it does not solve poverty. Therefore, developed countries should give other types of help to the poor countries rather than financial aid. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Financial funding is a way for how developed
countries
such
as The US and The UK to help underdeveloped nations
. However
, some people suggest that rich nations
should come up with other measures to solve poverty
. I definitely agree with the statement.
Firstly
, it's understandable that the economy
is the most important pillar for countries
and helping the poor by giving financial aid
will be beneficial. Additionally
, nations
must have strong financial fundamentals to meet the needs of society and financial aid
will help the economy
of the poorer countries
. For example
, The United Kingdom offered some money to the Republic of Somalia in the late 19's. The purpose was to help the economy
in Somalia which was experiencing setbacks with high inflation and creating poverty
. Correspondingly. it was proven that in less than 5 years, the economy
of Somalia witnessed better than ever. Financial aid
is considered the most important measure to help poorer countries
to rise from poverty
.
On the other hand
, some people suggest that rich nations
should come up with other measures of aid
such
as medical intervention and education to develop human resources in the poorer countries
rather than financial funds. Furthermore
, the level of human resources in terms of health and education in poorer countries
should be improved with support from developed countries
in order to rise from poverty
. For instance
, Australia offers a scholarship, namely the Australia Award Scholarship, which allows students from any citizenship around the world to study at some well-known universities in Australia. It is an example of how a rich country provides educational support to other countries
, especially to the
underdeveloped Correct article usage
apply
nations
. I agree that money given to poorer countries
is not the only way to solve poverty
, although
financial fundamentasl
are important, it is evidence that lower economic condition is not the only problem faced by underdeveloped Correct your spelling
fundamentals
countries
. However
, developing human resources must be considered as the major factor to rise from the poverty
of poorer nations
.
In conclusion, Although
funds from developed countries
have played a vital role in development. However
, another form of help in terms of education and medical intervention has benefited the country a long way.Submitted by muhammad.alfarasyi on
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task achievement
Clarify the main points in your argument. At times, your essay veers off-topic slightly. Stay focused on whether financial aid alone can solve poverty or if other measures are necessary.
coherence cohesion
Be careful with grammatical errors and punctuation issues, which slightly impact the clarity. Proofreading your essay before submission can help. For instance, 'Correspondingly. it was proven...' should be 'Correspondingly, it was proven...'.
task achievement
Your introduction provides a clear stance on the issue, which is good. The reader understands your position from the outset.
task achievement
You use relevant examples to support your points, such as aid from the UK to Somalia and Australia's scholarship program.
coherence cohesion
There is an evident introduction and conclusion, which helps frame your essay well.
coherence cohesion
The points flow logically for the most part, making it easy to follow the argument.