Some people think that exercise is key to health, while others feel that having a balanced diet is more important Discuss both view and give your opinion

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In the modern era,
health
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is often considered thorough. There are conflicting views about
exercise
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and a balanced
diet
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.
While
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people
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prefer to choose a well-round eating habit, I would argue that doing
exercise
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can help many
people
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to obtain the perfect
health
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. On the one hand, there are two reasons that you need to do
exercise
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if you want to be healthy.
Firstly
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, doing
exercise
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is the most common way that
people
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can choose to improve their
health
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because you can do it at home or at the gym.
Furthermore
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, you can change the
exercise
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to level up your working out to be suitable
with
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for
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the bodies of each individual.
Secondly
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, doing
exercise
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can improve sleep when the muscles are active enough, the brain will consider it and send the signal to the body that it needs sleep to regenerate the muscles and you will get better sleep. And when you have better sleep you can make your mood better
On the other hand
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,many
people
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believe that a balanced
diet
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will bring many benefits. Because it is a bit expensive to follow a
true
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truly
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balanced
diet
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some
people
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can not afford it. Sometimes choosing a balanced
diet
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is so complex that some even do not know anything about the nutrients. In conclusion,
diet
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still has benefits
although
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doing
exercise
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and eating junk food at the same time can bring negative effects. In my view, choosing
exercise
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is the basic way to improve
health
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rather than a balanced
diet
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.
Submitted by midden-02.tore on

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task achievement
While the essay addresses the topic and presents arguments for both exercise and balanced diets, the conclusion could be stronger by summarizing the main points more succinctly and clearly conveying your stance.
task achievement
Ensure that the arguments for a balanced diet are fully developed and provide specific examples or evidence to support your points. This strengthens the argument and balances both sides discussed.
coherence cohesion
Work on the logical structure by making sure that each paragraph transitions smoothly to the next. Using transitional phrases can help maintain the flow of the discussion.
coherence cohesion
The essay should have a better introduction and conclusion. Clearly state the topic and your stance at the beginning, and succinctly summarize the main points and your opinion at the end.
task achievement
Develop your main points with more supporting details and examples. For instance, when discussing the benefits of exercise, you could mention specific health benefits such as cardiovascular health, weight management, and mental well-being.
task achievement
The essay addresses both views on the topic, showcasing an understanding of different perspectives.
task achievement
The argument in favor of exercise includes multiple points, showing an effort to present a comprehensive view.
coherence cohesion
You demonstrate a good understanding of sentence structure and vocabulary, making your essay readable and engaging.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Cardiovascular health
  • Metabolism
  • Chronic diseases
  • Immune system
  • Mental well-being
  • Nutrients
  • Malnutrition
  • Obesity
  • Type 2 diabetes
  • Circulation
  • Nutrient distribution
  • Preventive health
  • Energy levels
  • Balanced diet
  • Essential nutrients
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