Some people believe that unpaid community service should be a compulsory part of high school programmes (for example working for a charity, improving the neighbourhood or teaching younger children) To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #community #service #part #school #programmes #charity #neighbourhood #children

Certain individuals argue that non-profit socially beneficial activities should be made mandatory in school education. I completely agree with

this

statement.

This

essay will explain with reasons and examples for my opinion.

Firstly

, students are at the optimum age to start their

community

service, since it will help develop their personalities. Committing to charity work and educating underprivileged

kids

, makes young adults self-aware of their society and they will act

according to

the needs of the

community

For instance

kids

in Japan actively participate in charity work from their schools. These

kids

grew up to be more helpful and respectful to others, than the

kids

who did not grow up in Japan.

Furthermore

, these activities can ultimately help improve one's

community

. Cleaning the neighbourhood is a great example. A clean neighbourhood will have fewer crimes and better business.

However

, others may argue that the

kids

this

age should focus on studies only. Admittedly much time will be diverted from students for these activities. But

this

will not affect the teenagers much , as they are studying real-world experiences.

Also

, there is an element of danger, when children are out doing social work as they are much more vulnerable to crimes.

This

can be avoided by an adult always accompanying and guiding them during those hours In conclusion, I strongly believe that unpaid

community

service should be part of high school programmes .

This

will help students become self-aware and learn about compassion for others.

Also

this

will help society to improve.

Submitted by augustinjose99 on Thu Jun 20 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion

Ensure consistency in the use of certain terms. For instance, 'socially beneficial activities' and 'community service' are used interchangeably which is acceptable, but maintaining consistency can enhance clarity.

coherence cohesion

Improve the transition between paragraphs. While the essay overall is cohesive, smoother transitions can help the reader follow the argument more effortlessly.

coherence cohesion

Try to enrich your arguments with more varied vocabulary and complex sentence structures for an even stronger impression.

task achievement

The essay addresses the prompt comprehensively and presents a clear stance on the issue.

task achievement

Arguments and counterarguments are well-balanced, showing both sides of the issue effectively.

coherence cohesion

The essay is logically structured, with a clear introduction, body, and conclusion.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

252 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

Topic Vocabulary:

unpaid
compulsory
high school programmes
charity
improving the neighbourhood
teaching younger children
valuable learning experiences
communication
teamwork
problem-solving
compassion
empathy
connect
positive impact
mandatory
personal development
social development
interested
motivated
volunteer

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

7.5
band
Advanced technology has brought many beneficial changes to the world. However, some old people today struggle with the use of technologies such as mobile phones and the Internet. How can the elderly benefit from using advanced technologies? How can the elderly be encouraged to use consumer electronics more often?
It is commonly believed that older generations today find difficulty using the advanced technology that is bringing beneficial changes to the world. This essay will discuss how modern technology can benefit old people and the measures taken to encourage them to consume more electronic devices.
5
band
The only way to reduce the amount of traffic in cities today is by reducing the need for people to travel from home for work, education or shopping. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
The narrative to minimize traffic in urban areas by implementing mobility restrictions recently is a hot discussion among citizens. Activity that supports traffic such as going to school or work is need to add some restrictions, for sake of reducing traffic. Objectively, there are some benefits, however i partly disagree with some extent for this solution.
5
band
Some people believe that children should be banned from using their phones during the school day. Others believe that children should be allowed to use their phones. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Few people argue that phones usage at school should be restricted while some others believe that students should be allowed to utilize their mobile phones. Personally, I completely agree with the first statement because bringing phones to schools can affect the children's concentration and social interaction.
6.5
band
New forms of money are becoming extremely popular nowadays. Is this a positive development or adding risk to the system? Should new money technology face greater regulation and scrutiny? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. Write at least 250 words. You should spend about 40 minutes on this task.
The form of money has always been changing since humans started to buy and sell their necessities. Even in this modernized world, these new styles are becoming prevalent among people. Undoubtedly, they add various positive values to the economy, however, they would bring detrimental risks to the monetary system if strict regulations are not imposed about this issue. In the subsequent paragraphs, I will discuss the importance along with the risks these new features might bring.
<4
band
In recent years, there has been a considerable rise in crimes committed by the young in cities. What has caused this? What solutions can you suggest?
In contempory young are being inflused by voilence or having less parentail support which makes them enrol in criminal activities. It can be caused from lack of parental supervision or ignorrnance from adults which can cause contribut to youth crime.

Some people believe that unpaid community service should be a compulsory part of high school programmes (for example working for a charity, improving the neighbourhood or teaching younger children) To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

The only way to reduce the amount of traffic in cities today is by reducing the need for people to travel from home for work, education or shopping. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In recent years, there has been a considerable rise in crimes committed by the young in cities. What has caused this? What solutions can you suggest?