Some people say that the only reason for learning a foreign language is in oder to travel to or work in a foreign country. Others say that these are not the only reasons why someone should learn a foreign language. Discuss both of these views and give your opinion.

In recent
time
Fix the agreement mistake
times
show examples
, a debate has arisen regarding whether the reason behind learning a foreign
language
is only to travel or work in a foreign country,
however
,
others
and I
aruge
Correct your spelling
argue
are
otherwise
. I firmly believe that learning a new
language
can be for the sake of
personaly
Correct your spelling
personal
development and to horizon
one
's perspectives. In
this
essay
Add a comma
essay,
show examples
I will elaborate more and discuss both sides of
argument
Add an article
the argument
an argument
show examples
. On the
one
hand, some advocate that it is more common for individuals to
leaning
Verb problem
learn
show examples
a new
language
to
further
enhances
Correct subject-verb agreement
enhance
show examples
their prospects
to find
Change preposition
of finding
show examples
better job
apportunities
Correct your spelling
opportunities
and improve
thier
Correct your spelling
their
living standards.
For example
, people study
Correct article usage
the english
show examples
english
Change the capitalization
English
show examples
language
to move out abroad to work or study in an
english spoken coutries
Correct word choice
English-speaking country
show examples
such
as
USA
Correct article usage
the USA
show examples
or
UK
Correct article usage
the UK
show examples
, given their advanced and developed economy, making it more
perferable
Correct your spelling
preferable
to live in.
Thus
, we can not neglect the fact that
studing
Correct your spelling
studying
a new
language
open
Wrong verb form
opens
show examples
up new doors to
enhaces
Correct your spelling
enhance
enhances
the potential of
person's
Correct article usage
a person's
show examples
life.
On the other hand
, learning a new
language
has
numerious
Correct your spelling
numerous
benefits.
One
of the most significant
advantage
Change to a plural noun
advantages
show examples
is improving
one
's cognitive abilities.
For example
, studies have shown that bilingual individuals are more likely to have higher
IQ
Fix the agreement mistake
IQs
show examples
comperad
Correct your spelling
compared
to their peers.
Additionally
, it helps individuals to be more open and accepting of
others
by
leaning
Correct your spelling
learning
show examples
more about their cultures, traditions,
norms
Correct word choice
and norms
show examples
,
boardening
Correct your spelling
broadening
their horizons and
provide
Wrong verb form
providing
show examples
them with a more comprehensive worldview.
Thus
, there are invaluable advantages a person can
acuire
Correct your spelling
acquire
by
leaning
Correct your spelling
learning
show examples
different
Correct article usage
a different
show examples
language
. In
conculsion
Correct your spelling
conclusion
, after considering the mentioned points, it can be reiterated that
although
learning a foreign
language
can boost
one
's prospects
to
Change preposition
of
show examples
upgrade
Verb problem
improving
show examples
their living in a foreign country, there are various benefits people can get including improving cognitive skills, and being more open and accepting of
others
.
Therefore
, I am content that
leaning
Correct your spelling
learning
show examples
others
'
tongue
Fix the agreement mistake
tongues
show examples
is a game-changer decision.
Submitted by marammajid1999 on

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task achievement
Your essay provides a comprehensive response to the task, discussing both views and giving your opinion. However, to improve your score, ensure that your examples are more specific and relevant to the context. For instance, instead of general statements, refer to specific studies or statistical data where possible.
coherence cohesion
Your essay structure is logical and easy to follow, with a clear introduction and conclusion. However, ensure that each paragraph transitions smoothly to the next. Using cohesive devices like 'furthermore,' 'moreover,' or 'consequently' could enhance the flow of your essay.
coherence cohesion
Work on improving grammatical accuracy and vocabulary usage. Some sentences are slightly awkward or contain minor grammatical errors. Strengthening your grammar and using a wider range of vocabulary can greatly enhance your essay.
task achievement
You provided a well-rounded discussion of both views and clearly stated your own opinion, which is crucial for a high task response score.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear and logical structure, with an introduction, body paragraphs addressing different perspectives, and a well-articulated conclusion.
coherence cohesion
Main points are well-supported, and the examples, although they can be improved, do help in illustrating your arguments.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • facilitate
  • immersive
  • cognitive benefits
  • bilingualism
  • problem-solving skills
  • multitasking
  • dementia
  • cultural understanding
  • empathy
  • global awareness
  • social connections
  • personal enrichment
  • self-satisfaction
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