Some people believe that youngsters should be required to have full-time education until they are at least 18 years old. What extent do you agree or disagree ?

#people #youngsters #education #years

is argue

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is argued

show examples

that having

Change the article

show examples

education

full

time

should be a requirement for young people until they are at least 18 years old. I totally agree with

this

statement and in

this

essay

Add a comma

essay,

show examples

I will give you the main reasons why the principal goal of youngsters should be

education

. One of the reasons why children should

be focus

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be focused

be focusing

show examples

school

is because is their future. They need

a good scores

Correct the article-noun agreement

a good score

good scores

show examples

in elementary, middle

school

and high

school

in order to go to college. The university requirements are hard,

therefore

only a small percentage of student applications are accepted.

For instance

, students have to attend extracurricular classes

such

sport

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sports

show examples

, language

program

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programs

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or art to achieve extra

point

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points

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in their

curriculm

Correct your spelling

curriculum

for college. Another reason I agree with the

full

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full-time

show examples

time

education

for juveniles is that they don't need distractions

such

part job

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part-time

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time

or other extracurricular

activity

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activities

show examples

. They only have one

Correct your spelling

responsibility

responsability

Correct your spelling

responsibility

Correct pronoun usage

which is

show examples

Correct pronoun usage

which is

show examples

Fix the infinitive

to go

show examples

Fix the infinitive

to go

show examples

school

, if they have

distraccions

Correct your spelling

distractions

they will have low

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

their

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

scores in classes or quit

Change preposition

apply

show examples

Change preposition

apply

show examples

school

. A clear example of

this

is that in

USA

Correct article usage

the USA

show examples

16 years

old

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16-year-old

teeneagers

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teenagers

are able to have a

part

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part-time

show examples

time

job in stores or fast food restaurants,

However

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However,

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they cannot

with

Change preposition

apply

show examples

the

school

projects and

job

Fix the agreement mistake

jobs

show examples

Therefore

a large proportion of learners quit

school

before they finish college. In conclusion, people believe that a requirement for juveniles less than 18 years old should be

have

Fix the infinitive

to have

show examples

a full-

time

education

. In my opinion, I agree with

this

statement because young people should

be focus

Change the verb form

be focused

be focusing

show examples

on their studies in order to have a career in the future and is

they

Correct pronoun usage

their

show examples

only

responsability

Correct your spelling

responsibility

Submitted by Vlguerrero7 on Fri Jun 21 2024

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clear comprehensive ideas

To improve clarity and comprehension, work on sentence structure and grammar. Ensure that each sentence is complete and clear.

relevant specific examples

Analyze more detailed and specific examples to support your points. This will make your argument stronger and more persuasive.

complete response

Try to address potential counterarguments. This will show a more thorough understanding of the topic and make your essay more well-rounded.

introduction conclusion present

The essay has a clear introduction and a conclusion that summarizes the main points, which enhances readability and coherence.

logical structure

Main points are presented in an organized manner, making it easy to follow the writer's line of reasoning.

relevant specific examples

The examples, although needing more detail, are relevant to the points being made and support the argument.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

firstly
secondly
thirdly
in additional
moreover
also
for example
for instance
therefore
however
although
even though
despite

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5Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
34Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

273 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people believe that youngsters should be required to have full-time education until they are at least 18 years old. What extent do you agree or disagree ?

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Television is a tool that can be used to learn. Therefore, children should be encouraged to watch it regularly at home and school. To what extent do you agree?

Young people are often influenced in their behaviors by others in the same age group. Some argue that peer pressure is important while others feel it has distinct disadvantages. Do the disadvantages of peer pressure outweigh the advantages?

The increasing use of credit cards has led to a rise in personal dept. Some people argue that this is a problem that needs to be addressed, while others argue that it is a necessary part of modern life. Discuss both sides of this argument and give your own opinion.

The number of students studying science at university is constantly declining. What do you think are the causes? What effects will this have on our society?