IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

In many countries, more and more people choose to buy imported food rather than food produced locally. Why do people buy imported food? What could be done to encourage people to buy local food?

#countries #people #food
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Nowadays, there is an increasing number of
people
 choosing to buy foreign
food
instead
 of local
food
. I do believe that there are many reasons behind
this
 phenomenon and we can implement numerous methods to foster local
food
 consumption.
Firstly
,
people
 prefer overseas
food
due to
 its
quality
 and standard of safety.
It is clear that
 the foods which are exported to other countries around the world have undergone a
strickly
Correct your spelling
strictly
show examples
 check policy to ensure the ingredients list and the origin of
products
.
This
, in turn, has attracted
people
 to believe and purchase foreign
food
.
Secondly
, imported
food
 contains a diversity of substances that are good for
people
’s health.
For example
, some foods from developed countries like fruits, milk, and so on have higher nutrient rates.
Moreover
, the goods exchange policy among the countries has contributed to resident’s imported
food
 choices. These
products
 have appeared in lots of markets and
thus
,
people
 will tend to purchase imported
food
that is
 good and safe for their health. To tackle
this
 problem, I think that enhancing
people
’s awareness about the
quality
 of local
food
 through the
internet
Capitalize word
Internet
show examples
 should be considered the most effective
long- term
Correct your spelling
long-term
show examples
 solution. Some media organizations can generate advertisement programs for residents to know more about
products
 produced locally.
In addition
, the business and local farmers implement
strictly
Change the word
strict
show examples
 processes to ensure fresh ingredients and detailed product labeling.
Therefore
, the local
products
 are
also
 famous and become the choice of many
people
. In conclusion,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
foreign
food
 has been consumed more than local ones
due to
 its
quality
 and safety standards. To boost the number of purchasing domestic
products
, we can promote these
products
' development through advertisements and ensure their
quality
.
Submitted by huyentrang712 on

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task achievement
Ensure more detailed and relevant specific examples to strengthen your arguments.
coherence cohesion
Maintain a consistent and clear logical structure throughout the essay by explicitly connecting your ideas.
introduction conclusion present
The essay effectively presents a clear introduction and a well-rounded conclusion.
complete response
It responds to the task comprehensively, addressing both reasons for buying imported food and methods to encourage buying local food.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • allure
  • novelty
  • diversity
  • perception
  • premium
  • globalization
  • cuisines
  • economic factors
  • subsidies
  • tariffs
  • competitive
  • farm-to-table
  • eco-conscious
  • consumption
  • sustainability
  • local economy
What to do next:
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