Some people believe that unpaid community service should be a compulsory part of high school programs (for e.g. working for a charity improving the neighborhood or teaching sports to younger children). To what extend do you agree or disagree?

#people #community #service #part #school #programs #e #g #charity #neighborhood #sports #children

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Correct article usage

the

show examples

field of education is high

school

Use synonyms

programs.

Ratio

Add an article

The ratio

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of different subjects is a cause of controversy for some people. In

this

Linking Words

essay

Add a comma

essay,

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we will dispute

about

Change preposition

apply

show examples

unpaid community service in

school

Use synonyms

discuss

Correct word choice

and discuss

show examples

advantages

Correct pronoun usage

its advantages

show examples

and disadvantages.

To begin

Linking Words

with advantages. The most evident benefit is profit for society. Children will help

Change preposition

apply

show examples

adult workers, comply

unqualified

Change preposition

with unqualified

show examples

labour. But what will children get

instead

Linking Words

? Why will they work? Teens can receive very useful experience.

For example

Linking Words

, adolescents can teach more young

student

Fix the agreement mistake

students

show examples

sports or sciences. Experience

Change preposition

show examples

public performance and

work

Wrong verb form

working

show examples

with

audience

Add an article

the audience

an audience

show examples

are

usefull

Correct your spelling

useful

skills not only for teaching

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

but and for other domains of life. Another example, teens can learn labour professions. Not all adolescents will get

Change the article

show examples

intellectual job, for many

Add a comma

persons,

show examples

persons

Replace the word

people

show examples

it will be

usefully

Change the word

useful

show examples

On the

Linking Words

contrary

Add a comma

contrary,

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disadvantages exist.

High

Add an article

The high

show examples

school

Use synonyms

program

Fix the agreement mistake

programs

show examples

Correct subject-verb agreement

are

show examples

very overloaded, adolescents have many

diffucult

Correct your spelling

difficult

exams,

they

Correct word choice

and they

show examples

haven't time to sweep

streets

Correct article usage

the streets

show examples

Also

Linking Words

, the significant moment, some teens will be scientists, important workers in industry,

crucial

Correct word choice

and crucial

show examples

employees in government.

Than

Correct your spelling

Then

show examples

Correct article usage

the more

show examples

they will learn maths, natural science,

liberal

Correct word choice

and liberal

show examples

arts, the better

future

Correct article usage

the future

show examples

will be for society. Some of them are great people in

them

Change the pronoun

their

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generation. In conclusion, my opinion is that

this

Linking Words

idea can

try

Wrong verb form

be tried

show examples

, but

don't

Verb problem

not

show examples

spread out in advanced

Use synonyms

school

Fix the agreement mistake

schools

show examples

with very smart students. For

others

Add a comma

others,

show examples

it can bring benefits.

Submitted by andreidiakov2100 on Fri Jun 21 2024

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task achievement

You should make your introduction more specific to the topic and state your position clearly. The current introduction is a bit vague and doesn't mention your stance on the issue.

task achievement

Work on expanding your main points with more detailed and specific examples. This will make your arguments stronger and more convincing.

coherence cohesion

Improve the transition between your points to make the essay flow more smoothly. This will help with overall coherence and make your essay easier to follow.

coherence cohesion

Proofread your essay to correct grammatical errors and awkward phrasing. This will help improve clarity and readability.

task achievement

The essay attempts to discuss both advantages and disadvantages, which shows an effort to address the task comprehensively.

coherence cohesion

Your conclusion is concise and states a clear opinion, which helps to leave a strong impression.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

6
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
35
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

223 words

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Some people believe that unpaid community service should be a compulsory part of high school programs (for e.g. working for a charity improving the neighborhood or teaching sports to younger children). To what extend do you agree or disagree?

Fully explain your ideas

Nuclear power is far too dangerous, therefore, countries should ban its use and concentrate instead on developing alternative sources such as hydroelectric power and solar energy.to what extent do you agree.

In some countries, people who commit less serious crimes are made to undertake community service* instead of a prison sentence. Some people believe that all people who have committed a crime should be sent to prison. Do you agree or disagree?

In today’s society, both Western medicine and traditional complementary forms of medicines’ are now widely known and used. The effectiveness of these kinds of treatment is determined by the patient’s mental attitude towards it. To what extent you agree or disagree?

In some areas of the USA, a ‘curfew’ is imposed, in which teenagers are not allowed to be out of doors after a particular time at night unless they are accompanied by an adult. What is your opinion aboout this?

In many countries, people now wear western-style dresses such as suits and jeans rather than traditional clothing. Why is this? Is this a positive or negative development?