Many developed countries are giving financial aid to poor countries. However, this hasn’t solved the problem of poverty in these nations, and so other types of help are needed. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In our world, there are a lot of good things. Financial
aid
is one of these things. These things affect our
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
show examples
in many ways.
While
it is a commonly held belief that financial
aid
plays a crucial role in shaping our future and is a topic of great importance in today’s society, there is
also
an argument that opposes it. Some people think that
this
is a positive
development
,
while
others disagree and think it may lead to adverse ramifications. In my opinion, I consider the impact of financial
aid
on individual and societal
development
cannot be overlooked.
This
essay agrees that financial
aid
is beneficial.
This
essay will discuss the effectiveness of financial
aid
in addressing
poverty
and suggest how other types of
assistance
can be more effective.
To begin
with, financial
aid
has significant effects on the economies of poor
countries
.
In other words
, it provides immediate relief and supports basic needs
such
as healthcare,
education
, and infrastructure.
For example
,
according to
a report by the World Bank (2021), financial
aid
has helped reduce extreme
poverty
in some regions by funding vital services and infrastructure projects.
However
, despite these benefits, the challenges posed by systemic
poverty
require urgent attention and action. Issues
such
as corruption, poor governance, and lack of economic opportunities remain pervasive. In Sub-Saharan Africa, despite receiving substantial
aid
, many
countries
continue to struggle with high levels of
poverty
and unemployment.
This
suggests that financial
aid
alone is insufficient to create sustainable economic
development
. Another point to consider is that other types of
assistance
can be more effective in addressing the underlying issues of
poverty
.
In other words
, investing in capacity building,
education
, and technology transfer can create long-term sustainable
development
. As an example
for
Change preposition
of
show examples
that, a study by the International Monetary Fund (IMF, 2020) indicates that
countries
receiving technical
assistance
and capacity-building support have shown greater improvements in economic stability and growth compared to those relying solely on financial
aid
.
Additionally
, comparisons made in the Journal of
Development
Economics (2019) highlight that nations focusing on
education
and skill
development
see more significant
poverty
reduction than those that only receive financial
aid
.
For example
,
countries
like South Korea and Singapore, which heavily invested in
education
and technology, have successfully transitioned from low-income to high-income status within a few decades. By way of conclusion, after a detailed analysis of both points of
views
Fix the agreement mistake
view
show examples
, I believe that addressing
poverty
requires a multifaceted approach. By implementing and supporting other types of
assistance
such
as capacity building,
education
, and technology transfer, we can create sustainable economic growth and reduce
poverty
more effectively. Individuals and organizations should advocate for comprehensive strategies that go beyond financial
aid
to ensure long-term
development
and prosperity for poor nations.
Thus
, integrating various forms of support can lead to a more holistic and enduring solution to the complex issue of
poverty
.
Submitted by fatoomdes on

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task achievement
Your introduction provides a clear overview of the topic, but it can be more concise to avoid repetition. Try to focus specifically on your agreement or disagreement with the prompt to make your stance clearer from the beginning.
coherence cohesion
The essay could have a clearer thesis statement which outlines the main arguments you will present. For instance, explicitly state that while financial aid has benefits, other forms of assistance are crucial for sustainable development.
task achievement
Improve the clarity and conciseness of some sentences. For example, revise sentences like 'In other words, it provides immediate relief and supports basic needs such as healthcare, education, and infrastructure.' to 'It provides immediate relief for basic needs such as healthcare, education, and infrastructure.'
coherence cohesion
Ensure each paragraph has a single clear main idea, and start each paragraph with a topic sentence that directly relates to the thesis statement. This can enhance the logical flow of your argument.
task achievement
The essay includes specific examples and references to credible sources, such as the World Bank and IMF, which strengthen your arguments and demonstrate a good level of critical thinking.
coherence cohesion
Your conclusion does a good job of summarizing the main points and restating your position, which provides a sense of closure for the reader.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • financial aid
  • development aid
  • sustainable development
  • economic growth
  • vocational training
  • poverty alleviation
  • infrastructure development
  • trade and investment
  • healthcare initiatives
  • technological transfers
  • corruption and governance
  • effective utilization
  • long-term solutions
  • economic disparity
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