IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

INCREASING THE PRICE OF PETROL IS THE BEST WAY TO SOLVE THE GROWING TRAFFIC AND POLLUTION PROBLEM To what extent do you agree or disagree? What other measures do you think might be effective?

#price #petrol #traffic #pollution #measures
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Due to
Linking Words
 the revolution of
automobile
Correct article usage
the automobile
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industry
Add a comma
industry,
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 most
of
Change preposition
apply
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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people are using private
vehicles
Use synonyms
,
hence
Linking Words
 the
traffic
Use synonyms
 crisis and environmental impacts are soaring daily, especially in urban areas. There is a good solution to eradicate
this
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 by escalating the
cost
Use synonyms
 of
fuel
Use synonyms
. I strongly disagree with
this
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 statement by giving the
below mentioned
Add a hyphen
below-mentioned
show examples
 points.
Initially
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, most of the individuals have
Change the word
their
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an
Correct pronoun usage
their
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 own
vehicle
Use synonyms
 at
present
Add an article
the present
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 ambience.
Moreover
Linking Words
, government banks and
others
Correct quantifier usage
other
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 private
vehicle
Use synonyms
 dealers are offering
lot
Change the article
a lot
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 of
vehicle
Use synonyms
loan
Fix the agreement mistake
loans
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 to
enthrall
Change the spelling
enthral
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 customers to buy a
vehicle
Use synonyms
.
Thus
Linking Words
, consumers who are deploying private
vehicles
Use synonyms
 have increased abundantly.
Therefore
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,
Use synonyms
traffic
Correct article usage
the traffic
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 crisis has increased drastically.
In addition
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, to eliminate
this
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 issue, if the
fuel
Use synonyms
cost
Use synonyms
 has increased it will directly affect the public, because the
fuel
Use synonyms
cost
Use synonyms
 is the deciding factor of the country’s economy and there might be a chance for increasing the
cost
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 of
other important thing
Change the wording
another important thing
other important things
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 which are required for people. To illustrate, in my country the oil price
is varying
Wrong verb form
varies
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 frequently,
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due
Correct word choice
and due
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 to
this
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 the other products
such
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 as groceries, vegetables and medicines prices are increasing and
this
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 will create more financial burden
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
public
Add an article
the public
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.
Furthermore
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, there
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
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 a lot of ways to avoid
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
traffic
Use synonyms
 and environmental pollution. Better government put a special tax
for
Change preposition
on
show examples
 private
Use synonyms
vehicles
Change the noun form
vehicle
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 owners and encourage the public to use public transport.
In addition
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,
pollution
Correct article usage
the pollution
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 control board and transport department will conduct a regular inspection
on
Change preposition
of
show examples
vehicles
Use synonyms
 and put
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
severe penalty, which has not
maintained
Wrong verb form
maintaining
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 properly.
To conclude
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,
traffic
Use synonyms
 crisis and environmental pollution must be reduced
then
Linking Words
 only the country will become a good shape.
For that
Change preposition
That
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fuel
Use synonyms
 increasing
fuel
Use synonyms
price
Fix the agreement mistake
prices
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 is not fair and it will affect the people who are
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
below
poverty
Correct article usage
the poverty
show examples
 line.
Submitted by smsundaram57 on

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Improvement
Pay closer attention to grammatical rules and ensure that sentences are well-structured. This will help improve the clarity of your ideas.
Improvement
Make your introduction and conclusion stronger by clearly stating your stance at the beginning and summarizing key points effectively in the conclusion.
Strength
You have provided a clear stance on the issue and supported it with relevant reasons, which shows a good understanding of the topic.
Strength
The essay presents several solutions to the problem, demonstrating comprehensive consideration of the issue from multiple angles.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Discourage
  • Incentivize
  • Alternative energy
  • Public transportation
  • Lower-income
  • Carpool
  • Ride-sharing
  • Congestion
  • Urban planning
  • Pedestrian-friendly
  • Tax incentives
  • Electric and hybrid vehicles
  • Emissions standards
  • Cleaner vehicles
  • Congestion charges
  • Bicycle lanes
  • Sustainable
What to do next:
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