A company has announced that it wishes to build a large factory near your community. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of this new influence on your community. Do you support or oppose the factory? Explain your position.
Most part of the
earth
population lives in conditions of industrial economy. The Change noun form
earth's
country
power depends Change noun form
country's
from
Change preposition
on
quantity
of produced Add an article
the quantity
a quantity
commodies
Correct your spelling
commodities
therefore
governments strive to build many factories. One location of construction ones is nearly
with a small community. Replace the adverb
near
This
decision has as benefits as
downsides. We will discuss both positions and find a good answer.
Rephrase
well as
To begin
with the advantages. First and foremost, it is worth noting that by the end of factory construction
it will have provided many workplaces Add a comma
construction,
hence
it will help to solve an
eventual problem of Correct article usage
the
the
joblessness. Correct article usage
apply
For example
, many cities and towns in the former USSR was
founded around the great enterprises.
The next positive point is the direct investments from a company in the community economy. It is interested in the improvement of the local market and logistics. The company workers will ensure the demand for Change the verb form
were
the
local production.
Correct article usage
apply
Nevertheless
, the substantional
problem Correct your spelling
substantial
is exists
. Most Change the verb form
exists
manufactures
make a pollution of the environment. It has negative effects Correct your spelling
manufacturers
for
health, Change preposition
on
Correct word choice
and cause
cause
miscellaneous diseases Correct subject-verb agreement
causes
such
as a
cancer. Even if the company Change the article
apply
will do
its activities Wrong verb form
does
safe
for humans, it can damage the local congenial climate.
In conclusion, I believe that Change the word
safely
this
question must be solved by the indigenous population independently. I rather approve this
idea, but I am afraid to Change preposition
of this
loss
my health. Replace the word
lose
Overall
, everybody should compare all parameters and decide which ones are more important in every specific case.Submitted by andreidiakov2100 on
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task achievement
You have addressed the prompt and discussed both advantages and disadvantages. However, your arguments could be more detailed. Providing more specific examples and explanations will strengthen your essay.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Nonetheless, the logical flow can be improved. Ensure that ideas are connected smoothly with transitional phrases.
language
There are several language inaccuracies and awkward phrases that detract from your essay's clarity. Reviewing grammar rules and doing more practice will be beneficial.
content
You clearly present both sides of the argument, which shows a balanced approach to discussing the topic.
coherence
Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, helping to frame your argument.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.