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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Every country in the world has its own road rules, but many drivers don’t obey them. What do you think are the reasons for this? What can be done to solve this problem?

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A
lof
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lot
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 of
drivers
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 throughout the world
do
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does
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 not follow the
road
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rules
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,
regarless
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regardless
 of the country they are driving in.
This
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 essay will talk about some of the reasons why
people
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 are not obeying the
rules
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 and potential actions to be taken that could help solve the issue.
To begin
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 with, it is crucial to mention that the driving style largely depends on the country and its society. Some nations generally respect and follow the
rules
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 more than
the
Correct article usage
apply
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others.
For instance
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, it is a well-known fact that in Asian countries the traffic conditions and the
overall
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 behaviour of
people
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 on the
road
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is
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are
show examples
hactic
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hectic
.
Thus
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, local traditions and norms can severely
influnce
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influence
 the driving style of the population.
Additionally
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, bad driving style can be caused by not having strict enough
rules
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 and high enough fines. By
this
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, in certain countries, where
people
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 understand they will not suffer from any dramatic consequences, they can be breaking the
rules
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. To solve
this
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 problem, a number of measures could be taken.
Firsly
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Firstly
, more
road
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 safety cameras need to be installed.
This
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 will help to track driving violations and prevent
people
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 from breaking the
rules
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, as they will know they are being watched.
Secondly
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, higher fines need to be introduced, so that
drivers
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 will be more likely to obey the
rules
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 to avoid paying the premium.
Lastly
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, it would be effective to come up with a
point-system
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point system
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, where
drivers
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 would lose points every time they
brake
Verb problem
break
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 the law, which could result in the
driver
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driver's
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 license being suspended for a certain period of time.
To sum up
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,
this
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 essay covered some of the reasons
of
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for
show examples
drivers
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 breaking the
road
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rules
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 and discussed a couple of solutions on how to prevent them
of
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from
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 doing so.

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task achievement
You have addressed the task effectively, providing both reasons and solutions. To strengthen your response further, consider adding more specific examples or evidence to support your points.
coherence cohesion
While the logical structure of your essay is strong, pay attention to minor language inaccuracies and typos such as 'hactic' (hectic) and 'brake' (break). These can slightly affect clarity.
coherence cohesion
Improve coherence by ensuring each paragraph transitions smoothly to the next. Use linking words and phrases such as 'Moreover,' 'Therefore,' and 'However' to better guide the reader through your points.
coherence cohesion
Your essay is well-organized with a clear introduction, body, and conclusion, which contributes to strong coherence and cohesion.
task achievement
You provided a comprehensive response to the task, including multiple potential solutions, which shows a clear understanding of the topic.
task achievement
The points raised are relevant and logically connected to the task, enhancing the overall effectiveness of your response.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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