IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

You recently moved house and you used a removal company to help you move your belongings. However, some of your things were damaged in the move. Write a letter to the manager of the removal company. In your letter • Give details of the move • Describe the damage • Say what you would like the manager to do Write at least 150 words. You do NOT need to write any addresses

#house #company #move #belongings #manager #damage #addresses
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Dear Sir or Madam, I am writing
this
 email to express the bad experience I had with your company. I am planning to move from the South to a new house that located in the North, so I contacted the customer service of your company and I requested a track in order to transport my personal belongings. It arrived on
monday
Change the capitalization
Monday
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 morning at 8a.m and everything
seems
Wrong verb form
seemed
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 fine in the
begginning
Correct your spelling
beginning
.
However
, when the package arrived me and my wife decided to check our furniture and we discovered that most of the
belonging
Fix the agreement mistake
belongings
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is
Wrong verb form
were
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 damaged in a bad way.
In addition
 to that, my
wife
Change noun form
wife's
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 favourite mirror
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
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cost
Wrong verb form
costs
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 a
high
Correct word choice
large
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 amount of money is broken completely.
Therefore
, I kindly request from your esteemed
organisition
Correct your spelling
organisation
organization
 for a refund of the service cost, and if you need any
further
 information you can contact me by email. Looking forward to hearing from you, thank you for understanding. Nouf Mut, Best regards,
Submitted by noufxmut on

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task achievement
Make sure to proofread your letter for spelling and grammatical errors. For example, 'track' should be 'truck' and 'begginning' should be 'beginning'.
task achievement
Expand on the details of the damage to the belongings for a more comprehensive response. You mentioned 'most of the belonging is damaged'; specifying which items and the type of damage would make your letter more detailed.
coherence cohesion
Consider reorganizing the sentences for better flow. Mention the arrival of the truck and the initial satisfactory conditions before discussing the discovered damage to maintain a logical sequence.
suitable writing tone
The letter is polite and maintains a suitable formal tone throughout, which is important for this type of correspondence.
single idea per paragraph
Clear structure with separate paragraphs for each point (details of the move, description of the damage, request for action), which enhances readability.
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